Winter In The Blood
by Pirate In Desguise
Summary: What Happens when Aro decides to add a unique precious jewel to his collection? How will she be able to handle it? Follow two of or favorite characters in their journey of self-discovery. Unanticipated bonds are going to be built, Promises to be broken and Unexpected surprises to draw unexpected people closer.
1. Wolf Cries and A Tinge Of Reality

** Author's Note: it's my first attempt at writing so please Have Mercy and enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like the inventor of Chess. I'm just a meaningless player plotting the move of each pioneer.**

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><p>Jacob and I were patrolling during the silent night. We both agreed that Seth would better take the day's shift rather than roaming around in the dark moonless winter nights. Jake decided that even though the psychic does not see any kind of danger lurking around anytime soon, we still need to be careful. The Vulturri has a pride and a reputation to maintain and a revenge to accomplish.<p>

We usually run in silence and try not to get into each others' fur at we do. Running has always helped me clear my mind and hate the world around me less. I've come to term with the fact that I'm unfortunate. Luck hasn't been my conspirator for a while now. I tried to remember the last time I was truly HAPPY before that word disappeared from my dictionary.

Was it when Dad took me fishing with him for the first time?

Was it on my 15th birthday?

Was it when I was with him?

I growled desperately. I'm a pathetic emotional train wreck. I pushed my legs to run even faster. Somehow, it made me feel better, the idea of running away, away from the last memory of my father, away from Sam, from the pangs of jealousy I feel every time I catch Jake thinking of Nessie like she's the ancre holding him to dear life.

_**Leah? **_Jake asked in that tone of his. I know that tone by heart now.

_**What?**_ Even mentally, I can still spit the words.

He hesitated before thinking the words "_**I'm Sorry**_"

For a second I didn't say anything. Of all the people that wronged me, Jake is apologizing, like somehow he's defending them. Defending those I blame for taking my happy glow away leaving me empty and miserable. For an instant, I wasn't mad, I was fuming.

"_**I don't need your pity, Jacob!**_" I couldn't maintain the angry howl building inside of me. Like every fucking second since Sam left me for Emily, I need to be reminded how completely damaged I am. "_**Oh I have an idea Jake,**_" I continued my tone surprisingly cam but full of venom "_**why don't you just discard my beta and replace it by "Leah Charity Association?**_"

_**Leah!**_

_**Or even better, Leech Cullens Charity!**_

I haven't noticed when he outran me but Suddenly, Jacob was pacing in front of me. I was looking at a distant ancient tree, avoiding his eyes. Even in wolf form, Jake cant help being an open book. no need to speak, his eyes says it all.

_**Leah, I understand what you're going through.**_ He passed the thought in my head, but I can hear the soft tone he haven't used with me since our last heart-to-heart when Bella was pregnant.

_**No Jake! You understood. Not anymore. For God's sake, you replaced her with her daughter, Jake. Her Daughter! Why can't I find a replacement? Why? Oh I forgot! Maybe because I'm a genital dead end. How did my father have his heart attack? Oh right! Because I phased into a wolf one day. The blows keep coming. They never stop coming, harder and more painful every time. God, Dammit!**_ I hate showing signs of vulnerability and weakness in front of Jake, even though he's kind of my only friend now.

He was quiet for a moment, and I made mo attempt to run past him when he quietly thought _**Go rest, Lea. You got a long day tomorrow.**_

I mentally frowned at this. _**Why? What's tomorrow?**_

That's when he noticed his slip and tried to quickly hide his thoughts with thoughts of Nessie. I pushed further in his mind trying to find a clue of what he's talking about.

_**Leah! Go!**_ He practically shouted in my mind. I ignored him and dig deeper. _**And that's an Alpha order! **_Jake knew from practice with the pack and the mind-reader bloodsucker how to control his thoughts so it was useless.

He turned to leap between the trees before I can argue.

Back at the house, I can hear mom's soft sow breathing and Seth's loud snoring. I tiptoed to the kitchen to get something to eat when I saw an envelope on the kitchen counter. It was square-shaped and formal. A pretty white ornamented orchid was placed at the left top of it while a lacy ribbon wrapped it up to form a bow at the back. A wedding invitation.

Some voice at the back of my mind screamed at me not to open it. Not to even touch it. I ignored it as I opened the envelope with shaky hands even though I just _knew_.

Darkness started wrapping my heart and my lungs until I was hyperventilating. I fell to my knees while my whole body was shaking. I knew I won't phase. The human in me is the one was grieving and mourning while the wolf remained mute. I couldn't maintain the sob building inside of me any longer. I wept in silence for a long time before the faded light of dawn started shimmering through the window. Before I knew it, Unconsciousness was taking over me. I didn't fight it.

I managed to sleep for three hours straight without any nightmares darkening my mind. The bell rang over a hundred times before I managed to zombie-walk to open the door. Whoever it is, is going to have to endure some serious doze of Morning Leah.

Shock left me wide-eyed and speechless as the walking dead in front of me looked straight in the eye and said" We need to talk."

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><p><strong>Have Mercy if you Review *-*<strong>

**Thanks. I love you all.**

**~G**


	2. Contemplations and Cynicism

**Hello everyone,**

**I am extremely apologetic for being a horrendous uploader.**

**these past weeks has been quite hectic i had to overnight on WEEKENDS. which is quite torturous. **

**that's why i'm in dire need of a BETA. So please, if anyone is interested in being mine for this story, Message me. i would really really appreciate it :)**

**so thank you for everyone for the reviews, favourites and Alerts. GothChiq80, bad-princess400, 45JacobAndAlex45, Dark-phoenix-fire10, dragongirl423, loukritia, brankel1, Baylee143 and LoveRileyForeveerMariee24, you keep making me smile :)**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like Frank Gehry, i'm just a meaningless architect-in-the-making using her marvelous work as a base to build my creativity on. **

**while we're at it, we might as well have a glimpse on our favourite bad guys...**

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><p>Alec's POV:<p>

I was sleeping in my bed for what seemed like days. Not exactly sleeping but more like starring intently at the microscopic dust in the air, my mind blank just like a dead. Life is more than excruciatingly dull when the world is peacefully calm. Compared to the amount of opponents we managed to make with time, the world should have been a battlefield. I do miss having to watch some thoughtless vampire's trial and it ending up in the classical way.

I heard Jane's monotonous footsteps before she opened my door a fraction of a second later. "Aro's summoning us." She exclaimed. "And get up brother. You know how Aro hates to be kept waiting" she added in her usual authorative tone.

I don't mind her bossy attitude as much as I mind how fully dedicated to Aro she is. Always working to please her master. Don't get me wrong, I'm forever grateful to Aro for saving us from a bunch of parasites claiming prophecy. He has been our father-figure for four centuries now and it's obvious we were his favorites.

But I can't help but loathe his cynicism sometimes. Making Chelsea use her gift on us to strengthen our dedication to the Volturris was a concrete proof he pushed it too far. Seeing how we were highly ranked amongst the guards, we should be at least fully trusted.

I sighed before getting up and headed towards the main room within a heartbeat. I laughed internally at the irony of the expression.

Jane and I took our usual positions right next to Master Cauis' enormous chair facing everyone while Chelsea stood at the other end of the throne room next to Master Marcus. Within a few minutes, the whole guard party appeared and Aro started his meeting.

"Good Evening Everyone" he started in his high-pitched voice. He rubbed his hands together in mischief. I have been around enough to know this tic of Aro by heart. The last time he did it was last week at Loretta's execution. Whatever the aim of this meeting was, it was surely not to announce that he suddenly decided taking dancing lessons.

"My dear brethrens and beloved friends" he paused for effect "I am considerably over joyous to call this meeting to discuss the addition of a new individual to our guards"

No reaction from the crowd except for Jane who hissed. I took her hand in mine and squeezed it in warning.

His eyes danced around, making eye-contact with every member of the guards, lingering lastly on Jane. He seemed totally amused by her jealous reaction. He was absolutely beaming at our confusion. Knowing things when everybody else doesn't makes him completely pretentiously ecstatic.

Aro was always so fond of theatricality. I wonder if having witnessed the lives and read the minds of hundred thousands is what brought the Mad Hatter inside of him on. Every meaningless life is only a comedy night show born just for entertainment and boredom-killers.

Everyone waited patiently. Before Cauis lost his temper and asked spitefully "who is it, brother?"

Aro suddenly lost his childish aura and his poker face fell. He mustered an unfamiliar expression on. It might have been the vampires' translation of a frown. Aro never hesitates. Doubting Aro, thinking for a second he might have miscalculated his Machiavellian plan made me suddenly feel extremely uncomfortable. The light atmosphere strained. Whatever got Aro deliberating at the last minute must be huge.

Modesty was never Aro's companion. Master was well-aware of the power he held over all of us, including his brothers. And it was obvious. He never felt obliged to tell us about recruiting a new guard member. Except for Chelsea, Jane and I for obvious reasons. But for him to make a big fuss over it? Why did he feel the dire need to prepare us for the news?

I was suddenly mildly curious. Who is it? Is it someone who voluntarily decided to join? After the whole Cullens fiasco, unlikely. Is it some human that holds some potential when turned? Maybe. Or some extremely powerful vampire we need to snatch from a coven? I'm not sure.

"I can not help but be ashamed of the unfortunate turn of events that occurred half a decade ago. Our coven, dear friends, is still paying the price of such a disappointing visit. I=our credibility and reputation are on the hook. And what horrifies me the most, dear friends, is that the Volturris are loosing their tight grip on the world due to the birth of the hybrid child." Aro began in his well-known confident loud voice.

The Cullens were involved. The moment Aro mentioned the name; I clenched my fist with Jane's hand still in mine. The grip was tight enough to break a human's fragile hand. She shot me a death glare before hissing viciously "brother". I remained still before swiftly moving my eyes left then right before focusing on her. Jane seemed to pick up the warning in my "Don't" glare.

I glanced around. No one with a sane mind brought up the Cullens' subject around the castle. Our first epic failure. The topic remained a taboo after the humiliation we subjected ourselves to. Leading an exploitation trip based on the statement of a vengeful vampire was not considered one of the Volturris' brightest moves.

The last person to even mention our humiliation was slaughtered and burned. By Jane of all the guards. Of course Jane was more than happy to oblige. Even_** if**_, hypothetically speaking, there was still a fraction of hope she might actually see the light of day, Loretta's dumbness lead her straight to her eternal death. The heroic smile she shot Jane while under her influence was of a warrior yet of goddess which made Jane quicken her death in frustration.

The Volturris does not believe in the Florence Nightingale's effect. Second chances by no means are to be given. But never did I saw Aro's mood darkening because of the recalling of a failure. Loretta's foolishness is what triggered Aro's resolution then. Interesting.

"As saddening and disappointing as was our last encounter with the Cullens, due to our high expectations, I can't help but be fascinated by the company they hold" commenced Aro.

Tension at this moment could have been cut with a knife. No one even moved a muscle at the news. Everyone was working so hard not to burst out and argue with Master knowing it would be fatale move. I gazed at Jane from the corner of my eye. Her wrath might have caused the death of an entire agglomeration's population. My grip on her hand was still solid and I whispered lowly "Janey". She froze at her human nickname and calmed down a bit.

Unlike someone who couldn't contain his snarl any longer.

"Brother!" Cauis growled "how could you even imply such a thing? Have you forgotten our lethal past concerning those creatures?

Silence remained for a while. If Cauis didn't know better, he would have pretty much taken it upon himself to try to kill Aro. But that would be extremely irrational knowing whose side the guards would take.

Aro turned to face his brother and held his hand up solemnly "No dear Cauis, I have not. The Children Of the Moon shall eternally remain our enemy. Their vindictiveness seeded terror in many villages that they exposed our supernatural world many times obliging us to clean after the chaos they inflicted. But Justice served them fairly, has it not now?"

His eyes roamed to set on Chelsea, Demitri and Felix and finally settled on Cauis. A smirk was tugging at Felix's and Demitri's lips at the reminiscence.

Aro continued before Cauis can interrupt "at first I was more than flabbergasted that such predators still exist seeing that dear brother made sure of their extinction. These werewolves were too much a nuisance incapable of resisting temptation. However,"

Some of the guardsmen here have been part of the werewolves' extinction mission like Chelsea who made them turn against each others and Demitri who tracked every single one of them down. Felix during one of the guards "Fun Nights" made sure to hammer every excruciating detail about the fight that occurred in our heads. It made me envious that they got to freely kill some disgusting wolves without their gift being ineffective during the offense and I must admit, it was extremely torturous not to beat him senseless that night. Pun Fully Intended.

"I was able through Edward's gift to penetrate their minds. And if I shall say, their functioning is absolutely fascinating. Above all one little grey wolf caught my interest. The smallest yet the bitterest. She has something to her that would make her fit in with the Volturris perfectly. So what do you think, dear Marcus, dear Cauis about bringing her here so we could have a decent talk with her?

_Her_. So the grey wolf is a she. I quite remember her eagerness of jumping on one of us during the hybrid's fiasco.

I know someone wouldn't be too happy about Aro's future pet.

Cauis' next words mirrored our silent reaction."Please clarify your intentions concerning the dog, brother" he spat the last words.

If the joker truly existed it would be Aro with his poker face on. Ignoring the vicious tone, Aro was more than ecstatic to retort applauding his hands together loudly. "Indeed. Brother Marcus has noticed some relationships issues concerning the she-wolf towards her fellows. Have you not now, brother?"

Master Marcus looked up and gave a faint nod in answer.

"While her fellows are usually the calculating type, she is the most stubborn one of them. She's not afraid of challenges but is always working to impress that former lover of hers. Her bond issues with the rest of the pack caused her to detach herself from them even though she is obliged to constantly share their minds. She is overprotective of her brother who she would basically do anything to insure his safety and happiness. Regardless of being the only shape-shifter in the world, she ought to be the easiest target yet the most precious indeed. The intervention must be quick and agile. I am quite positive Leah would falter in her decision. Chelsea would make sure of that since Bella will not be capable of following her around. I'm pretty sure the she-wolf can not tolerate it. That by itself should be enough to trigger a tension in the truce between the Cullens and the pack and a quarrel between her pack and her former lover's"

Even though Chelsea much to Aro's dismay can not be inflicted on them, loosening the bonds that the Cullens has with its entourage is surely Aro's style. Chelsea is the highest ranked guard for not reason.

After some minutes of contemplation and silence, Aro exclaimed:

"Jane darling?"

Jane's face lightened up like a child on Christmas Eve. She had the same expression she wore looking at the village's fiasco four-hundred years ago. I sighed faintly.

"Alec. Demitri. Felix. Santiago and Chelsea dear. You will leave in two days. And remember, no mistakes are allowed."

Jane flinched in insult "We will not fail you, Master" she curtsied and left the room.

An execution or enduring a guard dog. That should be… Fun.

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><p><strong>Note: Demitri is still the main character, but i just wanted to introduce Aro from one of HIS personal favourites' point of view. Plus, Alec is awesome so... ^.^<strong>

**Anyway, the good news is that i was working on chapter 2 and 3 simultaneously, so Chapter 3 mustn't take long to be updated. you'd finally be able to know who was knocking at Leah's door *meschievous smile* **

**hint hint: it's not who you think it is. whoever you think it is *even wider mischievous smile***

**thank you for reading.**

**~G **


	3. Bombshells and Confusion

**okay so here's Chapter 3 just like i've promised. **

**Thank you very much for anyone who reviewed/Alerted/favourite.**

**I'm still looking for a Beta.. Sorry i'm desperate for one.**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like Marc Jacob. I'm just an amateur fashionista seeking inspiration in her sketches and designs.**

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><p>I was still alarmed as the petite vampire invited herself in my house. I followed her in and closed the door. I felt extremely uncomfortable because she wasn't even the slightest bit bothered that her visit will be causing me some serious truce-damaging trouble.<p>

"What are you doing here, pixie?" I spat "Last time I've checked, laPush was still…"

"Off-limit. I know" she waved her hand in dismissal as she answered absentmindedly.

Even though some kind of truce was settled between the Quileutes and the Cullens after the whole Jacob/Nessie thing, LaPush was still considered off-limits to all kind of vampires, vegetarians or not. Nessie was reluctantly allowed by the Council on the territory not because of her "half-humanity" but just because she's Jake's imprint.

But Alice is taking some sort of risk coming here. she's neither a troublemaker nor that naïve though. So whatever it is she wanted to tell me, it must be bad. Really really bad.

Great. Just great.

"What would the pack do when they recognize your scent in the area?" I asked her in challenge.

"Don't worry. I made sure they won't" she answered blatantly still examining the living room.

I raised an eyebrow questioningly. She's not underestimating the wolves now, is she? She turned around to face me. I felt 2 inches tall under gaze even though I'm more than a foot taller than her. I wonder how a pixie like her can be intimidating in moments like these. She rolled her eyes and sighed "and if they do, you'll cover for me"

I laughed bitterly. "Now, why would I do that again?"

She kept quiet for a while "I had a vision yesterday. It concerns you" she said emotionelessly. She made sure not to meet my eye as she continued: "the Volturris"

At the name, every fiber of every muscle in my body tensed, my breathing became shallow and my jaw was clenched. Nothing good happens when they interfere. Death seemed to follow them whenever wherever they set foot in. the mere vision of the Demons-looking-like-harmless-angels twins sent a shiver through my body.

"What about them?" I managed to whisper

That's when I saw Alice hesitating. Her eyes fixed on the chimney behind me.

'Spit it, Pixie" I nearly shouted.

"They want you" she whispered.

All the blood in my brain drained leaving me pale as I tried to process this.

They want me? Like dead? I mean why me? Isn't the whole pack they hold a grudge against? Why the Cullens are left out of this? It doesn't make any sense. But since when thousand-year-old powerful vampires are considered even the slightest bit sane? They're just a bunch of sadistic bloodsuckers that care for nothing but their own pleasure and entertainment even if it was on the expense of other's lives.

"Leah?" asked Alice in a concerned voice. Putting her hand on my wrist made me realize I was shaking badly. I was sure I was going to phase. In my own house.

_Just like the first time. _

Dad got a heart attack when he saw me phasing in this very room. I didn't know a wolf could be on the verge of phasing and hyperventilating at the same time. Vision blurred around me, I started seeing black spots as I realized what happened: Alice actually hit me. And in a shear force that would have put Mohammad Ali to shame. I would lecture Alice about it Leah-style later on but for now I was grateful it helped decreasing the intensity of my shaking. To calm me completely, she dropped the last fatale bomb by urgently whispering "Seth is patrolling, two miles or so away"

It was a low-blow. She got me there. If there was anything I haven't fucked up over the years was my over-protectiveness of my brother. It would be snowing in Hades before Seth set as much as a foot less than 10 miles radius near the Volturris. If I

After for what seemed like half-an-hour, I was over the primary shock so Alice was able to explain properly the Volturris' intentions: "you've met Aro and saw his sick collection of talented slaves" she grimaced "well after the little humiliation we inflicted on them, they're seeking revenge by jeopardizing our truce treaty. You caught their interest during the confrontation. Apparently some vampire was brave enough to bring the confrontation up and that was enough to infuriate Aro. So now they're coming to fetch you"

Even though, my death is not was the sadistic bloodsuckers want, I was still on edge. I should be relieved. Shouldn't I? There's still a tiny glimmer of hope that my death might be spared. Alice said they wanted to "fetch" me. So they're not giving me a choice in the matter.

"Why now? Why me?"

"You're one of a kind. As far as they know, you're the only female shapshifter in the world. Plus, The Volturris count the years just like you count the days. Aro has been scheming this the moment he was out of Edward's thought-hearing range right after the defeat. He asked me to keep an eye on them. But Aro is intelligent enough to be plotting on his own knowing that his brothers won't be able to stop him when the decision-making time comes. And you being a dark hole in my visions didn't help the prevention either."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I was confused what to feel at the time. Should I be Flattered that the royalties think I'm unique? That they gave me the one-way-ticket to run away of my sucky –pun intended- life? Should I be scared? Frightened might be the word? "How much time?"

Alice seemed half-relieved the hard part is over. She swiftly switched to business mode. "They're coming next Tuesday. Around midnight."

Five days. The Volturris probably think they're being too generous. But a lifetime won't be enough for me to say goodbye. No matter how bitter or angry I am, I was never _suicidal_.

"They're sending Jane, Chelsea, Demitri, Felix, and Santiago. They're still making up their minds on whether to send Alec or not.

That made me frown." Why would creepy cat-like leader send the evil twins when their powers are helpless against Isabella's shield? Is he stupid enough or so willing to let them die for an unworthy cause? "

"Trust me, Aro is anything by stupid. He's daring us to hurt them. No one could in million of years escape Aro's wrath if one of the twins dies. Even though Jane begs you to, ignoring her _might_ save your life. So you might as well prevent your brothers from hurting any of the Volturris. Especially Jane and Alec"

It makes sense in some ways. The Cullens are too much a bunch of Peace and Love hippies to try and get executed by Aro himself. But I'm not so sure about that the pack is this calculating and patient. I wonder if they'd be able to hold back if Jane tempted them to just exterminate her.

Then it stoke me, do I want my brothers to know? Would leaving them in the dark keep them safe? As much as I'm in dire need of some Anger Management classes because of them, they're still my brothers. Would they consider any form of decent compromise with the Volturris some sort of betrayal? Then comes the next question, how am I gonna keep them in the dark? It is possible Not to phase for a while? How would Jacob take it if I was suddenly 'neglecting' my duties, as a Beta, for just five days?

Would he realize something is going on?

Then I stiffened, noticing the hole in my plan. "who knows?"

Alice looked uncomfortable, almost ashamed "Edward. He was in the house when I had the vision. I couldn't hold it back"

I scowled. Mind-reading bloodsucker. Well, the bloodsucker and I would have a civilized talk soon, I guess.

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><p><strong>Hope you enjoyed :)<strong>

**well, i've figured out the general pattern of the story, but please message me your suggestions, predictions, expectations, I promise you I will make an effort to include them :)**

**Reviews, constructive criticism is pretty much appreciated.**

**Thank you for reading,**

**Love **

**~G**


	4. Dark Questions, Kisses & Seattle!

**Hello everyone :D:D:D**

**Who missed me? NO? Too bad! Because I'm back with a bid fat chapter that ~ hopefully~ can make up for the long time I was gone.**

**Once more, I wanna thank everyone who took time reading my story, thank a little more those who alerted\favourite\reviewed. your support for this story never fails in amazing me :)**

**Enjoy and Happy Easter ;)**

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like the undead Allison (Pretty Little Liars). I'm just like A. I know everything, and using it to manipulate Leah, Demitri and all the characters like the real A is blackmailing Spencer, Aria, Emily and Spencer. (Great show btw!)**

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><p><strong><em>"It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace."<em>**  
><strong><em>― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary<em>**

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><p>Right before Alice left, I knew I HAD to ask her about it.<p>

"Hey Alice, Jacob mentioned something happening today concerning me. What is it?"

I knew that even if it was left unspoken, some bond has been formed between Pixie and me. Sad it had to be under these circumstances.

"Emily will call you to meet up. She wants you to be her bridesmaid."

In a blink of an eye, Alice was gone. No need to see my future to know what it feels like to see people moving forward, enjoying their lives on your expense, especially when death becomes your constant obsession. So should I be bouncing in the air in utter joy just like in those crappy chick flicks? Fuck NO.

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><p>The idea of running away seemed like a very tempting idea right now. But what about the Volturi tracker? Wait a minute; I was under Bella's shield when they came, so I shouldn't be on his radar yet, right?<p>

Complication: Am I willing to leave the people I care about to deal with MY problems? Especially when the Volturis are concerned? Plus, on Demetri's radar or not, they _**will**_ track me down. And I don't think I would get on the Cat's good graces if it took them years to find me. Plus hurting the enemy's loved ones is their style. Thus running away is out of question.

I. Am. Doomed.

No other expression can describe the situation I'm in as perfectly. my fate has been decided for me. When would the universe get it in this stubborn head of his that I'm old enough that I'm grown-up enough to decide my own fate?

Karma probably assumes playing with the others' lives is just a sadistic game that was only created to feed her ego. A game I knew I will lose the moment the rules were settled. How does it feel to see me suffer, bitch?

I. Am. Doomed.

I'm not the most righteous person alive. I'm fully conscious of it. But again, what did I do to deserve this? How many major sins did I commit to be tangled in this mess? Is killing a bunch of untamable newborns even considered a sin? They would have ravaged entire cities if they were not taken care of. When does a wrong act committed for all the right reasons suddenly become justifiably wrong? **(A/N: this last sentence is borrowed to DriftingDreamer18 from her beautiful story "Lavender and Lilac')**

Life can be compared to a spectrum in this way. At the far ends of it remains the Good and the Evil, the Right and Wrong, the White and Black. From far away, the line between those two shades is clear as water. As you zoom in, this line looses its high-quality as its definition becomes blurry and confusing until it becomes this huge grey territory that every faithful person is unsure and uncomfortable traversing.

I. Am. Doomed.

As in I _will_ die. I'm realistic enough to have hammered the thought in my brain since Alice alerted me this morning. What's the point in holding on to this glimmer of hope when you're trapped in the claws of merciless bloodsuckers? Joining them is not a choice. I hate my brothers sometimes for being such pricks but not enough to betray them that way. At least I will still keep my pride and my loyalty intact even after my death. Love and Respect is how you stay alive, even after you were gone since Death always has the tendency to make all dead people saints. Maybe the infection will take hold of me too?

How would my mother handle the news? Will she turn into this lifeless recently-widowed woman who lost her daughter? Will she hold her head high proud of her martyred daughter? Or will she accuse me of being selfish choosing death over a humiliating pathetic life? Will I be selfish enough leaving my mother and Seth in the dark and letting Jacob incise their barely healed scars open once more?

I will die. Then what? What will happen to me? Life is eternal for us, will death be eternal too? Does Afterlife exist for supernatural creatures that has no place existing in the first place? Will I look up when my time comes and be blinded by a light shimmer from above absorbing my soul from this earth? Will I get to have a chaperone guiding me to a much better utopic (utopist?) place called heaven? Will I live an episode of "5 People You Meet In Heaven"? Who would I see if I was in Eddie's shoes? My dad? One of the newborns maybe? The Volturi's leader's dead soul?

Will I actually be able to meet my dad? Finally be able to apologize face to face, and not to an empty chair in some shrink's office? Or did Harry already hear my rehearsed speech from wherever he is?

Just like Dying would be absurdly the right thing to do in Martin Luther King's anti-segregation dictionary, 'I don't know' seemed to be the perfect answer to all of these questions.

Just as I was leaving the house, the phone rang.. I stopped in my track for a second before slamming the door shut behind me leaving it screeching on its own. Emily does not always get what she wants. Well, at least not today.

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><p>This seemed like a great idea an hour ago but now, I am starting to have my doubts. I gave the building a hard glare as I sat in the park facing the building. The glass envelope gave the building a nice professional aesthetic look. But behind its pretty look, the building represents just massive piles of offices and clinics. I kept looking unconsciously at one office in particular as I thought.<p>

The shrink has always had this theory about the law of attraction. According to her, I am attracting all these negative feelings and thoughts into my life. If I can get rid of the negative energy, I would live lighter and happier. "People are just happy as they make up their minds to be" she said last time I sat in her office. "Don't go around thinking you're the only one who has been this hurt before. Life is unfair, but it does not mean you go around thinking you're cursed. You need to stop blaming others for hurting you and take a look at this strong independent woman you became because of them"

But this time is different. Even though Ms Sullivan is one of the most sympathetic person I know, it took me a while to get comfortable with her. But teaching me Confucianism is one thing and telling her about the supernatural world is another. A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum is the last thing I need right now.

I tried to guess how she would act if I told her everything and she believed me, not only about the vampire/werewolves part but also the there-is-no-escape part.

"The funny thing about facing imminent death is that it really snaps everything else into perspective." She would say quoting James Patterson. She would rant about that quote for a while in a feeble attempt at convincing me how an awareness of death encourages us to live more intensely. Then she would advice me to read "Veronika Decides to Die" to see for myself how death is the catalyst in the process of self-finding and the blossoming of wisdom. She would then advice me to go out and look at the world around me. Try to find clues of what I should be doing in my days left. I frowned at this thought. Maybe I know what I should be doing more than her since I'm the one who is on the edge of a cliff waiting for Death to push me, head first, in the deadly valley. I flinched at the mental image.

"Excuse me?" someone asked unsurely, getting me out of my reverie.

I lifted my head to look at a very charming man in his mid-twenties smiling down at me. He had the most hypnotizing blue eyes I have ever seen. He was holding a thick book that I failed in reading its title.

"Yes?" I replied pleasantly.

The man glanced around disconcerted, looking as if he was doing some illegal activities. I raised my eyebrows curiously.

"I just saw you flinching and I wanted to see if you are alright." He lied smoothly.

"I'm fine, thank you" I answered softly. I glanced at the building and was mildly surprised when the man sat down next to me under the tree.

"I'm Theodore. And before you say anything, I know it's bizarre but I hate being nicknamed Ted" I eyed him amusedly. Congratulations Emmett Cullen, I just found someone with a more ridiculous name than yours.

"Leah" I answered

We sat in comfortable silence for a while. "Are you waiting for someone?" he demanded easily.

"Yes. My husband" I lied since the real reason sounded creepy enough.

"Oh" he replied. I saw a strange emotion in his eyes, but he quenched it before I could fully comprehend it.

"Yeah, he's a cardiologist." Heart-fixer. I laughed bitterly at my lie. "I just hate his job, you know. No mistakes allowed, having to constantly deal with death, with the guilt of being hopeless when someone dies." I vaguely continued actually living my lie.

"Have Faith. No one knows what might happen, yet we go forward. It is a strange world we live in. Full of contradiction and paradoxes."

I had this urge to correct him. There _are_some people who might know what would happen, and that was what set off my inner clock.

I looked at him before seeing a version of Anna Karenina in his lap. I smirked at him, reading a book which contradicts everything he believes about this world.

"I'm a Literature student. I'm mid-way through it and I already hate it." He looked pleadingly at me. I laughed, surprising myself, before he joined in.

It felt nice, almost normal for a while, sitting under a tree in a public park, having a decent conversation with a stranger for hours. I remember the feeling of alienation I had to endure in this world since I phased. I was so lost and scared I would hurt someone like Sam did Emily that I isolated myself from everything that once upon a time was normal. Reality always come crashing hard when you least want it to.

"I lied" I urgently announced looking Theodore in the eye "I'm not married; I'm just nursing a heartbreak. I'm sorry"

Theodore looked at me in an understanding expression before genuinely smiling at me. "Would you like to grab a coffee sometime?"

I hesitated. I really don't want to lead him on. Hurting him would be a crime. "Look Theodore…"

"As friends?" he clarified.

"Oh ok. That suits me. But you should know something…"

"Oh no, another lie?" he sighed dramatically.

I actually smiled at that. "No I'm leaving in five days. I don't think I'll ever come back. Ever." I made sure it sank in. I'll be damned if Theodore becomes a member of the Volturi's Black List.

Theodore looked skeptical before slowly answering "alright, wanna grab that coffee right now?"

It was almost dark when Theodore and I drew apart. We had this mutual agreement that it would be better for everyone –him- if this was the first and the last time we see each other. No phone numbers were exchanged; no last names given away, not even personal information that might lead to the other were mentioned.

But I felt the urge to do one more thing. I knew it was on Theodore's expense but I desperately wanted to test my theory.

"Hey, can I try something?" I asked him easily.

He eyed me cautiously before agreeing. "Yes?"

I stepped closer to him and looked him in the eyes. He knew my intentions and didn't wait for me to act upon them. He placed his hands on my waist and pulled me even closer. The warm aura caused by the fiery temperature of my skin made the situation more intimate. He looked at me questioningly one more time. I barely nodded before he set his lips on mine. The kiss was chaste, innocent but held so much power over the both of us. I knew I would never see Theodore again, but I needed this kiss. He pulled away a few seconds later. We looked at each other in silence. Some would say we're acting as if we're friends with benefits but they would never understand the connection we felt. Each one of us had something to prove to himself. I broke out in a huge grin that he mirrored.

The test was positive. I was finally over Sam.

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><p>Since it was my patrolling time, I decided it would be safe to phase without Jacob or my brother keeping track of my thoughts. The minute I was on four paws, I started running, I was still thrilled with my new discovery and for a while I successfully forgot about the Volturi. I pushed my legs to run faster.<p>

Surprisingly, I found myself on the Cullens territory. I slowed down and carefully walked to the huge mansion. I could hear a loud distinguishable angry voice ~ Jake's~ and other lower voices reasoning with my alpha. Only one heartbeat in the house. I made a sound of relief but before I could disappear unnoticed, Jake burst the door's open calling out "Leah?"

It's over. He knows.

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><p>Demetri's POV<p>

Seattle. Earsplitting loud and infuriatingly alive, Seattle can be easily be classified as one of the most annoying cities on the planet. And that coming from me, a deadly vampire, for crying out loud.

Other reason to hate Seattle, it is always the pit stop between home and failure. Humans are so stupid. The C.I.A might be claimed to be the genius cynical mind of the U.S. government but their obliviousness to what _**lives**_ in the small town of Forks never fails in boring me. Felix and I weren't the slightest bit surprised by how overrated the US forces and the Central Intelligence Agency are when we went on a examination trip to the Pentagon and the CIA's headquarter in Virginia. At least with the Volturi, each one of the guard is appreciated by Masters.

It was already dark. We separated in groups for practical reasons and not to rise any suspicions.. Alec and Jane went east. Felix and Santiago were heading out of the city.

"What are you waiting for, Demetri?" Chelsea exclaimed in her high pretentious tone. She hates to be kept waiting.

I looked again at the couple making out in the dark alley. No other human being is nearby, within two hundred meters radius. Thus, any scream would go unheard. Curiously I searched for the main target of the mission. Dissatisfied with my results, I sunk my teeth in the boy's jugular first. I didn't give him even time to scream. I lunched myself at the girl. I half drained her when I saw her. So she's at the Cullens along with the russet wolf. They're in their human forms though.

_Interesting. _

I smiled venomously before digging deeper in the girl's flesh. Leah Clearwater, you might want to be careful. Playing with fire might lead you to your grave early, sweetheart.

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><p><strong>well...<strong>

**i really hope you enjoyed this chapter since i had some difficulty deciding who Leah should talk to. at first i wanted it to be Carlisle (lol) then the therapist (does the fact that Leah has a therapist makes her slightly OOC?) then i finally settled on Theodore. Personally, i'm satisfied with the result. what about you?**

**Oh! one more thing :) i am perfectly positive that some of you were like "Where the heck is Demetri?" while reading previous chapters, so i hope his introduction in this story was alright. seeing him all mean and evil. hahaha :)**

**Anyway, reviews and constructive criticism are much appreciated :)**

**à Bientôt!**

**~G**


	5. Sacrifices & Second Families

** Hello once again dear readers :):):) **

**Exceptionally, I was able to write a new chapter during this vacation :)**

**Happy Easter to those celebrating it today.**

**thank you for all those who took time in reviewing, alerting and favouriting. i love you guys :)**

**A HUGE thank you for the amazing Istvry for betareading this chapter **

** Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like... Karl Marx, planting revolutionary seeds in our heads and watching those grains grow. Each one of us interpret those theories in his own way. Result: hundred thousands of Stories to tell. **(A/N: relying on historical facts and NOT on personal opinion. Respect)****

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><p>"Leah?" he called out to me. His rage was well-hidden behind a mask of pure blandness. I was not used to seeing this cold impassive Jacob. I guess tonight is all about ugly surprises and black revelations.<p>

I winced at Jacob's dead glare. Nothing is more venomous than Jacob's cold wrath. Anger is not an alien emotion when it comes to anyone carrying the werewolf genes. Our fiery temperature has the tendency to aid the fury to seep into our veins, boiling our blood further and thus causing the metamorphosis. Our transformation became too natural and intuitive that we stopped thinking about the mechanism of it or try to fight it. We're not much of Self-Control seekers like the cold ones. Quite the opposite, instincts play the biggest part in any fight for us.

When I snapped out of my thoughts, Jacob was still standing his ground on the porch waiting for some reaction on my part. Or maybe just an explanation. It is not every day that he finds out from a bunch of bloodsuckers that his beta kept the biggest secret in the world hidden from him, the vilest threat to Renesmee. From that point of view, I should be grateful; Jacob's instant reactions tend to be more instinctive and abrupt than rational, especially when it comes to the hybrid's safety. But this time, I could tell hewas thinking. Maybe he sees it as an exercise to empower his Alpha Strategic Mind.

Suddenly, my own thoughts made me feel nauseous. I was angry at myself. How could I? How could I hide something this HUGE from him? Isn't he the only person I sincerely trust? My guilty conscious did not let Edward Cullen off the hook. He shouldn't have done what he did, but still… I shouldn't have done it. I bend my head down and whined in total mortification.

That's when Alice showed up on the porch, setting some clothes on the stairs. Jacob's eyes never left mine as he let Alice forcefully tug him inside the house. The scene would have been comical if the situation wasn't so dangerously not in my favor. He was disappointed in me. My conscious was burning me at that moment, how could I even think for a moment to throw my entire burden, my duties towards my family on him?

The house was quiet, too quiet, like those haunted houses during Halloween. I quickly phased, and put the clothes on. They were obviously Rosalie's. I grimaced at the strong vanilla scent that would be following me for the rest of my short-lived life.

I went inside to face them.

They were all sitting in complete silence in the enormous living room. Their eyes didn't leave the floor. Esme looked like she was on the verge of crying if she could. The sight of her agonized face almost shattered my heart to a million of pieces, and that coming from me, merciless Leah Clearwater.

Even Jacob was not looking at me, so making as much noise as I could, I went and sat on the sofa opposing The Traitor and his wife. I sent him a death glare which could be interpreted as the optical equivalent of a punch to the face. He met my eye and nodded in acknowledgement.

"It was in everyone's best interest. It was in my best intention," he smoothly explained his actions.

I eyed him incredulously before launching myself at him. 'You sick ba…"

"HEY!" Surprisingly it was Jacob who pushed me on the sofa. Bella was standing defensively in front of her husband. I glowered at them before yelling, "Well guess again, psycho (I saw Bella flinching which only made my smirk grow wider) I don't need you to think for me. That was MY decision to make."

"Not when you are being chased because of us in the first place!" he scowled back.

That got under my skin. I stood still. So he wasn't implying…that they were planning to leave?

I saw Edward smirking slightly "Never did I assume you thought so little of us, Leah."

That is when I heard someone clear his throat before he started talking. It was Carlisle. "Speaking for my family and myself, I never had the chance to thank you enough forprotecting and bringing such well-being to my family, Leah. You are a wonderful person Leah, even if you show it in the oddest ways possible. We are very grateful to you, we even consider you as one of our own. I really hope the feeling is mutual and that you do consider us as your second family," he nodded humbly, his eyes never leaving mine, his eyes faithfully mirroring the honestly and the modesty of this man who had three hundred years on my age. If Doc was a politician, I was more than positive he would have made it at the very top of the most influential peace-makers in history; right next to Gandhi, Martin Luther King and the 14th Dalai Lama.

Suddenly, the memory of our last encounter with the Volturi came flashing before my eyes: Disorganized rows of vampires and werewolves facing the world's most dangerous murderers. The image focused on my wolf-self standing to Jacob's right. My expression was one of a martyr while Jacob was... in pain?

Just as quickly, the image vanished. I looked up to see Renesmee softly smiling down at me. The reflection of that gloomy day should have been enough to traumatize me since it took me exactly a year to get over my paranoia and my constant nightmares and to readjust to normality after the fiasco. The aftermath of the battle was just as worse amemory as the 5 hour encounter was. But I was surprisingly calm.

"You stood up for me once, Leah. I guess the payback time has come, hasn't it?" She exclaimed in her soft tranquilizing voice.

That's when I saw Edward, Bella and Jacob exchanging glances.

It was Jacob who beat them to it. "Actually Nessie…"

"NO!" the hybrid protested tightening her grip on my arm; she actually blocked my blood circulation making it hard for me to breath. "I want to be there." She added in a firm voice, meeting Jacob's eyes as if challenging him to deny her what she wants.

Jacob was left tongue-tied. Nessie was unquestionably his most beautiful dream, but she is also one of his worst nightmares. He can't seem to be able to refuse her ANYTHING. It is during times like these that I am almost grateful I cannot imprint.

When he saw Jacob falter, Edward took over: "Renesmee," his authoritarian tone suggesting the end of the discussion.

Renesmee was about to protest when her mother gave her a stern look and Rosalie came over to comfort her, running her hand through Nessie's soft auburn locks. She was obviously upset. She looked pleadingly at me. Her only savior, she assumed. Her eyes flickered to Jacob meaningfully. She was frightened for him too. Because she knows he's coming with me.

It suddenly hit me: everyone wanted to confront the Volturi with me. That was what Carlisle meant when he lectured me about the bond that we supposedly share. They talked it through and they made their decision.

Payback.

It was time I say something anyway. I looked around, my eyes setting on each one of them; my second family. Who would willingly come with me to fight an already lost battle? My voice was soft, my eyes pleading them to understand. "Umm. Nessie, your parents are right. It is too dangerous for you to come," She looked hurt as if I just stabbed her in the back, "but seeing how it's too death-defying for all of you to come, I just wish to go confront the Volturi alone. I hope you will all respect my decision"

It was too quiet for exactly six seconds, before everyone burst into loud disputes and failed attempts in convincing me to reconsider my choice.

"Leah dear," Carlisle started in his soothing voice, "I believe that it is also too dangerous for you to go on your own. And I believe it is my family and I's obligation to protect you just like you stood up for one of our own."

"Hell yeah, if they ever laid a finger on my niece in law, they would pay the prize hard! With Isabella's shield, we could do miracles! Jasper and I can take down Felix and Santiago while..."

I tuned him out as he and Jasper began discussing strategies and fighting tactics. It was my turn to stare at the floor in total mortification. What the hell were they thinking? They could never defeat the Volturi. I bet all of them, and not only the two burly men, were dirty fighters. What would decades of brotherly fights do against centuries of experience and expert fighting abilities? And even if we did, by some miracle, defeat them, just like Alice has already predicted, Aro would never take the death of Alec and Jane lightly. He would surely avenge them. In both cases, it is a death/death situation.

Was there any kind of compromise to be made with the Volturi? One that allows me to stay here and keep everyone else out of harm's way? I doubt it.

A negative response would lead to death. The Volturi are straight-forward but criminals nonetheless. My mind raced back to a specific moment during the confrontation: Irina's execution. She was barely given the time to explain herself and when the words already betrayed her, she was exterminated just like a nuisance, a meaningless parasite. More dangerously, she was destroyed by Cauis himself in front of everyone, especially her sisters. No one missed the mischievous look he shot the Denalis afterwards, daring them to challenge him. The sisters visited once, and it was obvious in their eyes that the scene of Irina's death still haunted them.

I could never do that to the Cullens, to Renesmee, to Carlisle, to Esme, to Jacob. I do not want their last memory of me to be a cold disfigured corpse lying motionless in the middle of the meadow. I looked up to see Edward flinching at my mental image.

I was on a train headed straight to the cliff and I could do nothing to stop it except push the Cullens out of the way. It was now or never.

I cleared my throat before I announced my finale decision in a confident determined voice. "As much as I appreciate your concern, guys, I would like to confront my fate alone." I looked at the elder Cullen as I continued, "And if you respect me and cherish my presence as much as you claim you do, then I am asking you to please let me be."

My gaze roamed around before I requested them to give me their word on it. My voice was quivering by then. They all nodded, pained "I promises" flew around. My gaze stopped at Jacob. He hesitated, obviously torn before Nessie held his hand, he nodded and scowled "but don't you dare die!"

"Tell Seth and Mom sorry of my part."

I couldn't hold the tears any longer, Esme following her maternal instincts, held me for a long, long time before I numbly cried myself to sleep.

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><p><strong> so i hope you liked it... <strong>

**makes me nervous when you don't tell me what you think guys, so HONEST reviews are more than welcome ^.^**

**If you have any suggestions, expectations propositions, please do share. i still haven't figured the end yet. i always thought the end would build itself through the data used in all the chapters but now i am not so sure so... :)**

**Love **

**~G**


	6. Chapter 6

_**The Tyger and the Beast (Part 1)**_

(while the Beauty and the beast" reference was not intended, Tyger refers to William Blake's poem by the same name (further explanation in Part 2)

Anyway. I. Am. Extremely. Sorry. for the delay.

had a series of self-esteem issues, writer's block, final exams, projects' stress, bla bla bla.. but i know, i know, no excuses.

would want to take a moment to thank everyone who bothered to read.

_for reviewing: _45JacobandAlex45, GothChiq80, dragongirl423, Baylee143, Jada91, GigiGoodfellow, hgmsnoopy, Mason and Alex, lstvry, Alissa21, Katt423, Sharice'94, ramupop and especially brankel1. thank you :)

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(extra hugs for those whose names figured more than once ;)

**Disclaimer**: Stephenie Meyer is a far away galaxy, her characters are the stars. we are just scientists who observes, take notes, put theories and assumptions to test... just like NASA :)

**PS:** i tried a different approach of this story in this chapter, please feel free to tell me what you think!

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><p><em>Looking up from underneath<em>

_Fractured moonlight light on the sea,_

_Reflections still look the same to me,_

_As Before I went under_

_(Never Let Me Go ~ Florence and the Machine._

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><p>A few minutes till midnight.<p>

The normally peaceful night she used to enjoy during her escape runs, turns into a tense hunted atmosphere. The midnight fresh greenery-scented air sends chills through her bones despite her feverish temperature.

She is past the grief and the self-pity. Yet she is scared. Frightened even. Having learnt self-reservation, she considers herself an excellent liar. Hiding the truth from her family was easy enough. It is the guilt that is not easily digestible. She would wake up at night, clutching her stomach, feeling as if she might throw up. It is torturously obvious her guilt was eating her up, sucking the mere present energy she got left.

She made sure to avoid her "second family" and her Alfa as much as possible. She didn't even bother excusing herself from skipping her patrolling duties. She can count on Jake to keep his distance and to keep Seth from asking too many questions.

She lay on her back not even caring it might look as if she is giving in for anyone that might approach her. She is tired. Of all the thinking, the fear, the nightmares. They all evaporat in thin air as she gasps at the view.

A silvery-blotched expensive crystal ball is already glistening at its apex in the pitch black, starless sky. It is almost ironical. How such a beautiful orbit can act as a willing witness of the extermination that will take place right under its watch. An innocent, almost angelical aura wraps the moon giving it a divine look. Darker shades of warm grey blotches on its surface, that only supernatural creatures are able to see clearly, gives it this impure and untrustworthy air to it, The equilibrium and the balance of the universe reflected in such a far from reachable element.

The humongous trees look suspiciously stalker-ish, an indestructible army looming around, dancing gracefully in harmony with the wind's whistling.

She gets up knowing the dark cloaks will make their appearance soon.

She blinks. In the three milliseconds it takes her to reopen her eyes, the judges in their dark cloaks arrives to court and her trial is about to begin. The epic graceful arrival last time is not repeated. they are not here to impress, They are obviously here to get their work done. Quick and mercilessly. It is clear on their faces that they don't mind getting their hands dirty in the name of justice.

Standing still, they look like soldiers led by two children. The twins in front followed by two butch men, then finally a delicate woman that looks no capable of real murder (as if she does not know better) and a frowning man that she assumes being the tracker. The scene would have looked almost comical if not cruelly dangerous. Their cloaks' dark color is in perfect harmony with the midnight atmosphere while, in contrast, their eyes are sparkling burgundy.

The angel-like child takes a step forward talking on the group's behalf.

"Well, well. It seems like the dog will not be causing us too much trouble. Is not that just lovely?" the girl exclaimes in her high-pitched honey coated voice.

Instantly, The She-wolf insider of her is boiling, shaking her badly, as if begging the human-her, to be unleashed. She wants out and now so she can rip the girl's head off. The shaking broadens the innocent-looking little girl's smile and encourages her to keep on pushing the woman (who is almost twice her height) around. "but in dire need of some anger management classes, I see. Well fear nothing, dog, I was assigned specially to tame the like of you for some centuries now"

The only thought that keeps the human under control is that she couldn't let the devil's little girl get inside her skin. She thinks of her brothers, how they will recklessly react if she, foolishly get herself killed. Her trembling decreases as she closes her eyes and takes some deep calming breaths.

As she openes her eyes, the unsatisfied child is frowning, a tight scowl on her face. Furiously, the brat refocuses her gaze on the woman in front of her who feels a faint pressure on her brain before they both comprehend what is going on: the shield is protecting her. For a moment, the wolfette looks pretty smug that the scowling girl is ready to bounce on her.

A hand falls on the tiny girl's shoulder. The child, still enraged for not having succeeded in triggering the expected reaction out of her, uses her black magic on you. The next thing you know, you are on your knees restraining your howls while looking at the witch right in the eye. You give her a bright painful smile which makes her multiply the intensity of the inflicted pain. The two butch men are both snickering, obviously enjoying the scene unfolding in front of them while her twin remains emotionless.

A few minutes passes before the twin brother spares you the torture by tapping his fingertips against her hand. Within milliseconds you are on your feet again. You quietly murmur something before you take a spot right in front of the twins and declare:

"I apologize on Jane's behalf. The Volturi means you no actual harm. You know the reason we are sent here, and we truthfully would like to negociate some of the deal's terms with you"

She nod sternly and suspiciously. There must be a trap there; no one of the vampires can be trusted.

"But first, why do you not go let your cowards of friends make their appearance? I am quite astonished they easily threw you in the fire like this" she hisses threateningly but you stand impervious. You tilt your head, and for a while you look like the dangerous predator that you really are. She hisses menacingly at you before you continue in what you hope was a cocky voice "It is kind of a shame you do not appreciate the good you have been blessed with. For the negotiation to be fair, your pathetic excuse of friends will act as the witnesses of your party"

Whatever expectations she had, she sure as hell has not expect this. She falters for a while before standing in the gravitational point between shock, hesitation and suspicion. She eyes you suspiciously for a while deliberating her options. It was obvious that hostility is radiating of her like heat from asphalt, and you do not like that at all.

For the first time, you really look at her before holding her gaze, making it easier for her to spot any lie she's searching for. After a while, she makes up her mind and simply nods.

As she turns to leave, she coincidently meets the quiet women's undecipherable gaze. The women sighs defeated the second the half-human metamorphoses into a wolf. The vampire knows at that moment that nothing can be done to turn back the hands of time now. A disaster is on its way, she can already hear the whistling of the bomb before it drops on its targets.

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><p><strong>i know it is not much, but it is some kind of introduction for the next chapter which will be much longer.<strong>

**tell me what you think!**

**~G**


	7. The Tyger And The Beast Part 2

_ Hello Everyone :)_

_ so i was watching last night the music video of Never Let Me Go by Florence And The Machine (the song i quoted in the last chapter). and the dude who plays Florence's love interest was strangely familiar. __**Ironically**__, it is Jamie Campbell Bower, the dude that plays __Cauis__ in the Saga movies!  
><em>

_ And apparently, Charlie Bewley has a twitter! i didn't know that! it's alchemission and he's verified :)_

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><p><em> Anyway, this chapter contains a major <em>_**spin-off**__. so PLEASE, in case you don't remember or you were confused about the last chapter, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE re-read it before jumping to this one._

__And once again, Thank you Istvry for being my amazing beta! you are awesome  
><em>_

_ Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer is like a genie. through her wide imagination, she was able to create a new world full of possibilities and new prospects. A promising land where everything is possible. We are just having fun analysing those possibilities, from every angle and every perspective :)_

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><p><em>Speaking of Perspective, this chapter is from <strong>Demitri's point of view<strong>._

_enjoy!_

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><p>Your mind works like a programmed computer. It is surprisingly able to understand a language no one else in the world can decipher, yet decode. Well, with the tiny exception of Bella Swan, of course. But again, no software ever created was flawless. Every system has a hole somewhere, and she was more than willing to dig that hellhole herself. It frustrated you at first, how a fickle little human could overpower you in such a way until you saw the look on Jane's face when she, too, was blocked out of Bella Swan's mind.<p>

The ugly truth is that you failed in getting in her head, yet she succeeded in creeping in yours. She made you question yourself, your gift, your morals, and most dangerously your place in this world.

Your mind is also one of a strategic, a predator with a "legal" license to kill. A Killer hired to serve justice. Unlike Jane, you try to represent the Volturi diplomatically, yet it is hardly the case. Backstabbing an outlaw was never considered a crime in your master's rulebook. Therefore, it is not in yours. You function the way Aro convinces you to function. You never question it since they provide you everything. They treat you like a jewel, a luxury you are sure is not available anywhere else in the world. Although never announced and always allured to, you know mistakes are not allowed. Let alone betrayals.

And that is the problem, betrayal is an absurd thought that your dead heart cannot comprehend. It is not an act of purely intentional rebellion. But either way, as soon as you figured it out, you knew you are a doomed man.

You find yourself in a crowded labyrinth. It does not frighten you anymore like it used you when you were a human, an amateur, a newborn. You already know every street, every intersection, every dead-end but more importantly, every person you encounter. It is not a foreign place, your mind, since you know and met everyone populating it. You search the maze for her, the wolf, the soon-to-be "colleague". But you find nothing.

_ She is shielded._

Yet you know already know where to find her. The second Aro made up his mind to proceed with this plan, the message was considered delivered to the concerned parties: you meet us or there would be some deadly consequences.

As you get closer to the meeting spot, a certain green meadow, you listen in for one heartbeat; she was there to meet you alone. She must have told the Cullens and her pack to back off. Playing tough, huh. It makes all of you smug, even Jane crooked her not-so-angelical smile. You smile wickedly at the idea of how idiotic she seems to be.

This will be easy, you tell yourself. You are already planning how to get even with Felix for amputating your arm during your last "friendly fight". You stand in the last row as always, since your task is usually done at this stage of a mission. You take the first look at Aro's future pet.

She is fine-looking, a muscled lean silhouette, a chocolate tan in contrast with the moon's reflection on her skin, fierce and focused human eyes, slick black hair cut in a careless yet brutal fashion, a pumping heart, blood in her veins. Everything you are not, and do not wish to be. Everything about her, every curve, every feature, and every tic is inherited, reminding you she comes from a centuries old civilization background. Her demeanor tells you a lot about her temper. A tight scowl was set on her face.

But all of that is not was confuses you.

You suddenly sense a violent sudden urge to protect her. For a moment, you are taken in a haze unaware of what is going on around you. Your eyes are in slits focused on the She-wolf.

**L**_**eah.**_

Annoyed that even in your mind, you cannot help but feel that ping of over protectiveness consuming you, drowning you in a sea of suspicion, self-doubt and confusion when you as much as think her name.

Your confusion and annoyance are beginning to mold into a dangerously unfamiliar emotion: desperation. You start chasing the demons out of your mind, struggling to find the key to break the malediction. A curse fate has thrown on you as a punishment for all your dreadful sins. In a feeble attempt in getting rid of this feeling, you try to convince yourself that she is perfectly capable of protecting herself. The last rope she needs to add to her tangled mess of a life is a Volturi guard clinging to her for dear life. You are self-conscience; you know she will never trust you with her life, will never open up to you, will never be yours like you all of a sudden desire her to.

* * *

><p><em><strong>"Tyger! Tyger! Burning Bright<strong>_

_**In the forests of the night,**_

_**What immortal hand or eye,**_

_**Dare frame thy fearful symmetry"***_

* * *

><p>You are suddenly extremely aware of your catastrophic situation. Without even having heard a word, you know how Jane would be playing one of her wicked games soon. You begin to panic as the paranoia starts drowning you, bursting new bubbles of dark death-involved thoughts. You are too frightened to move, to do something about it. You are walking on thin ice, thinking the least move you make would give you away. You're more aware of Chelsea's manipulative powers than ever. In the back of your mind, you are already conscious you will get busted. And it is not even your fault Leah started to spread in every cell of your brain, every synapse, every nerve that controls the least movement you make, like lethal doses of venom. The only thing that remains intact in your brain department is your gift. That is what differentiates Leah's influence on you from Bella's.<p>

In a millisecond, everything is put in perspective for you as Leah starts shaking. You know Jane is winning this round from her devilish smirk. You try to compose your expression as much as you can so it will not give you away. Being the soulless sculpture that you are, it will not be too hard, or that's what you try to make yourself believe. And if Chelsea is a cynical manipulative bitch, you just hope she will not expose you right here and now.

Leah has calmed down, but you are now boiling. Jane being the worst show woman in the history of showmen, is ready to pull her world widely known last trick, unsuccessfully obviously. Frustrated, she tries to inflict her gift harder. Nothing. It makes you secretly smug. You should have warned her. But you should have known from the moment you realized she was meeting you alone, forcing Leah into joining the Volturi is not an option. Jane is suddenly not good for the task anymore. You take advantage of this tiny detail to make your move.

_ It is time to interfere._

Not even caring or even aware how the hell you managed to surpass Felix and Santiago, you unconsciously place you hand on Jane's shoulder. But you should have known better. It was a mistake and Jane will make sure you pay for it. Everyone knows Jane loathes to be touched since she was raped as a fragile human little girl. Aro and Alec were the only vampires she fully trusts. Plus Jane has her pride, a dignity to preserve and a reputation to protect.

So as much as it hurts, it does not surprise you that you instantly fell to your knees growling in agony. The pain is familiar yet indescribable, it is a sort of pain that you will never get over: it is one hundred times worse than any pain you have ever experienced to a point it challenged the pain of the transformation. Even though you have suffered it more than your advanced mind can recount, it hurts badly, every single time.

But at least, you are relieved: Leah is not the center of attention of the ruthless predators encircling her anymore. You are well aware of Chelsea's gaze throwing daggers at you, but you risk a quick glimpse at Leah from the very corner of your eye anyway. Being naïve as she is, Leah does not seem to comprehend what is going on, why you would stupidly add gasoline to Jane's wrath like this.

Now, you are sure it was a foolish move. You cannot show neither Jane nor Leah any sign of weakness. You try to restrain your screams of pain as much as possible. A human would have died from hyperventilation in your position. You need Leah to trust you to be able to save her. The surge to protect her is too powerful to be condensed, too profound to be denied anymore. As for Jane, every agonized sound you make is considered the absurd equivalent to an ego boost in her dictionary.

Feeding her ego becomes tiring after four centuries of constant torment and suffering. You try a new tactic you learned from poor Loretta. You flash Jane the best smile you can manage. It looks more like a grimace but she seems to understand your intentions. Jane hates to be challenged, especially when it comes to her gift. You could easily see the steam evaporating from her dead cold skin. And little Jane always gets what she wants, so if the pain was slightly endurable before, it sure as hell makes you want to beg to be killed now.

"It is an illusion. It is an illusion. The pain is an illusion. Leah cannot see me like this," is a mantra you keep repeating in your head in a loud fast voice, like some sort of sacred prayer or some miraculous ritual that would save you.

You are left mercilessly kicking and occasionally screaming on the ground for what seemed like hours. Your bones are burning, your skin is melting, and your brain cells are exploding at a high speed. No one dares to cross Jane, even though you know Alec and Chelsea are the only ones who could without it backfiring at them. Thankfully Leah stays forged to her spot staggered and too shocked to interfere in the Volturi Household's fights.

Already bored of this sadistic theatrical scene unfolding in front of his bright burgundy eyes, Alec finally consoles his sister by brushing his fingertips on her hand. Jane looks at her brother in a respectful yet criticizing eye. But the fire is retreating ever so slowly from your whole body. You are instantly freed from Jane's claws. You give Alec a significant glance which he does not react to.

You act like you have not been humiliated by a fourteen -year -old- looking brat. You need to come up with a plan and fast. The situation is starting to grow on you. It is a delicate matter. Every move requires clever planning, every word a double meaning. You know you need to handle the matters yourself.

"I shall speak with her" you murmur emotionlessly, not even daring to see Jane's reaction. You have never faced Jane down. But you pray she will not suspect anything. If the matter could be rationally discussed with Chelsea, Jane would definitely have a blast getting rid of Leah herself. But the little devil remains unmoving which is always considered a positive sign.

You turn to face Leah. She is obviously puzzled and dumbfound of what happened. Her expression hardened as you look at her. As you are scrutinizing her venomously, your head is racing, miserably digging for a promising plan that does not involve anyone's death. You are making mental notes of your priorities and your requirements. But as for now, your main concern is Leah's trust and safety.

So in a soothing diplomatic voice, you start:

"I apologize on Jane's behalf. The Volturi means you no actual harm. You know the reason we are sent here, and we truthfully would like to negotiate some of the deal's terms with you"

You feel a tiny … thing squeezing your heart… literally. You instantly know what is going on. Chelsea's using her magical potion, on you. She is simultaneously trying to fracture your sudden "bond" to Leah and stimulate your link to the Volturi. While she has succeeded in the latter task, the first was an appalling failure. The string attaching you to her is obviously indestructible.

Even Chelsea cannot fix you. Your software is starting to dysfunction. It is being burned down by illusions and images that hold a much more powerful grip on you than Jane, Aro and even Chelsea. This situation is way more dangerous and self-destroying than experiencing mortification and rejection from Bella Swan's impenetrable mind. While Bella stroke a nerve blocking your gift out, Leah reached something deeper than what The Volturi and Bella could not reach.

Speaking of which, you research the maze for any trace of the Cullens. Unsurprisingly, they are all off-radar. Instantaneously, you are furious. How could they? How could they feed her to the lions like this? They stood up for them when they needed her. The woman is tough but they should know better.

"But first, why do you not go let your cowards of friends make their appearance? I am quite astonished they easily threw you in the fire like this" you were not planning on hiding your contempt and spitefulness when it comes to the Cullens, even though a plan pops in your head. The efficiency of it depends on several factors including most importantly Leah and…

She hisses at you. You could not stand her expression, that expression of pure abhorrence and loathing. It is getting harder and harder to keep your cold Volturi guard demeanor in front of her, when all you want is just to soothe her.

"It is kind of a shame you do not appreciate the good you have been blessed with. For the negotiation to be fair, your pathetic excuse of friends will act as the witnesses in your party".

You desperately want her to pick on the hidden message in every word you say. She glances at you in a furious yet curious manner. You shamelessly meet her eye trying optically to project everything you are feeling towards her into her eyes. She gives a faint nod, starts to vigilantly back away before metamorphosing into a wolf.

Once she was out of earshot, you hear Chelsea heaving a sigh. You take a moment before facing the rest of the Volturi guards. They all remained unmoving, soundlessly questioning your intentions. You are scared. This is the moment the rest of your life depends on. You need to be careful. They must not suspect anything.

It was Felix who inquiries you first. "What was that all about, Demitri?"

You give him a reproachable look before revealing the first set of cards in your deck of trick. "None of our gifts are efficient enough or capable of piercing through Bella Swan's shield, so making her forcefully join the Volturi guards is not an option. And Aro wants her badly. Thus we need to try a new strategy. Her bonds with her pack are already fickle and breakable. So we need to gain her trust. This rather accomplished by showing her we are not afraid to face them down, we are still in charge of the situation and that we are not hiding anything…"

You curse yourself internally and hope no one noticed your tiny slip. Your eyes hesitantly drift to Chelsea who is not even meeting your eye. You seriously ought to thank her later for covering up for you.

Jane looks furious. She steps closer to you, a scowl on her face, ready to pounce on you, but before she spits the first word, a sound could be heard.

The Cullens are here, accompanied by one huge russet wolf. They all stand tensed, ready to pounce in case the whole "negotiation" process goes south. Even not so little Renesmee is frowning, one of her hands caressing the wolf. It is not until you look closely that you notice the impact her simple touch has on the wolf's expression. Something about the whole scene makes you feel tense and edgy. This makes no sense to you at all. Twenty minutes were enough to break the ice inside of you. Leah was standing between the wolf and Jasper. You force your eyes away from her.

"Demitri," approached the elder Cullen.

"Glad you and your coven decided to finally join us, Carlisle"

"Only respecting Leah's wishes, Demitri. What shall I say? The power of free will was always our coven's greatest virtue." answered Carlisle picking up on the sarcasm dripping from your voice.

You falter for a nanosecond. He knows, you are sure of it. It is obvious on your face, you assume. You thank any superior power that might be up there that the rest of the Volturi guards are standing behind you and couldn't pick up the wavering in your composure.

You stood there speechless, your gaze dancing from a face to another. Some looked angry, others looked calm. Leah mostly looked both distorted and enraged.

"Aro wants to meet Leah. He has reasons to believe she has the potential to be an efficient Volturi guard. So we have a proposal for her and for you, my dear Cullens, to hear"

_** This is it.**_

The plan is in motion. There is no backing down anymore.

You make up your mind. You start projecting all the emotions you were feeling ten minutes ago, everything you locked away in a corner of your brain comes vulnerably scattered as memories and sensations on the surface of your brain. You stood perfectly still as the barriers you built around your emotions for the concerned person to be able to see the honesty in them.

_ I would never dream of hurting her._

Shamefully, you cannot even bring yourself to meet Edward's eye as your secret is finally out to him. Nothing is stopping him from exposing you for the imposturous Volturi guard that you became the second you set your eyes on Leah, but still he is doing it. For a split second, the thought that the Cullens are not actually a bad company to Leah crosses your mind. Instinctually, you look up at Edward, seeing a ghostly smile hunting his lips. Your eyes drift to Leah to see her reaction to the words you just spoke.

_ Whatever happens tonight, Leah just simply cannot die._

* * *

><p>The Cullens wait patiently for you to elaborate.<p>

"I believe your friends Leah has been around enough to know how the Volturi functions, how second chances are by no means given. However, we are willing to wait exactly one week for your answer if you are willing to obey some rules."

"What kind of rules exactly?"

"You will stay unshielded the entirety of the time."

You smile despite yourself, imagining already how it would feel to be able to perceive Leah's whereabouts.

"Absolutely not!"

You are taken aback by that unfamiliar voice. You turn to face the speaker. It was ever-so-innocent Renesmee. In a blink of an eye, the russet wolf bounced in front of her growling and ready to fight off anyone that might look like capable of hurting the girl. The scene is inexplicably uncomfortable and dangerously offensive for you. You give Edward a reproachable before as calmly as you can, answer.

"I believe this is not your call to make, dear Renesmee. Only Leah is concerned. You are just in attendance here as witnesses."

Leah's eyes flicker to someone behind you. Jane. That gives you the excuse you need to turn around to study the guards' expressions. Jane looked devilishly delighted with your proposition. Proud almost. You give her a warning glare before turning around to face Leah.

"No Volturi Guard will intentionally or is obliged to hurt you as long as you are considering Aro's offer. In the meantime, I am pretty sure Jane will learn to behave herself. You need to start trusting us, Leah." You struggle to keep out the deeper emotion in your voice. But it tries so hard to subconsciously portray to the now pinnacle of your otherwise monotonous existence the double meaning. If she only knew the effect that one look had on your body that you had long believed was forever cold and dead.

That statement about trust earns you a dark laugh. But you are not about to back down.

"No one will interfere in your decision-making. What do you say, Leah?"

Timing is everything. Those few nanoseconds pass extremely slowly. Everyone suddenly gets tenser, as if that was even possible.

"Yes, I will think about it"

That was the first real answer you have managed to extract out of her since the beginning of the confrontation. Her voice is strangely beautiful and her answer is promising.

**Disaster averted, **_**for now.**_

* * *

><p><em><strong>"Behold the beast because of which I turned; help me against her, famous sage, for she makes my veins and pulse tremble"<strong>_ _(Dante, The Divine Comedy)_

(felt like this quote is better left to the end, makes more sense this way :)

* * *

><p><em><strong>*<strong>_About the poem i quoted mid-story, it is called_ The Tyger by William Blake (Songs Of Experience, 1794). _

So Demitri can be compared to Blake's Tyger while Leah can be considered Dante's Beast.

okay, so i am not sure whether to continue with this approach of the story or not. _**Help!**_(through PMs or reviews :)

A bientot!_  
><em>

_Gia :)_


	8. An unlikely Ally

**Hello!**

**I am sorry for the long wait, but i can assure you I haven't had a moment of serenity this whole summer :/**

**So i am going to duck my head in shame and let you read this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer is like a librarian. Every character is characterized by a book in her archive. We are just students who use these characters as study cases, analyzing and exploring them in our ungraded essays :)**

* * *

><p>Demitri's point of view:<p>

Alex and Jane are in Seattle.

I miraculously managed to get them out of Forks in the span of a few hours after the confrontation. "Hunting around the area will definitely not help the negotiations, Jane" I have said as calmly as I could manage. It is in everyone's sake, but mostly mine to just keep them as much in the dark as possible, long enough for me to sort my issues out.

In fact, it is Alec who worries me more than Jane; having worked for centuries on their sides has really made me recognize their offensive strategies: Jane is so over-confident that she is never reluctant to speak her mind, which is most of the time. She good-naturally relies on her gift more than necessary. On the other hand, Alec is the best strategist within the Volturi guards. The issue is that he is reserved. Decoding his thoughts is quite challenging and extremely tough. Plus, the worst Jane can do is hurt me for a couple of minutes, while Alec can end my life without me being aware of it. And I haven't caught anything that might help me identify what he might be thinking of this whole situation.

Paranoia is starting to drown me to a point where I cannot help but check and double-check their position on my virtual map every 2 minutes. They are now in north of Seattle, 8th Avenue, Spring Street, exactly 85km away. It would take them 1hours, 15 minutes at full speed to get here. And Santiago and Felix are further exploring the deserted mountains of Vancouver. So it is safe to assume that I got enough time to have a fine head start in escaping the claws of the Volturi.

Yeah right, Like I would even contemplate gravely this option.

I sigh, an absurd mixture of relief and desperation wrapping me in their shell. Relief is a non-existent word in the Volturi's dictionary; you are too dedicated that there is no place for relief, because no mistakes are allowed. Getting away with a crime is a laughable absurd thought. Desperation is a new emotion that I am exploring. It is an uncomfortable feeling, makes you feel dependant and weak. I have always been dependant and weak, of Masters but I have never minded much. This sort of desperation that I am feeling right now is different; it is the repulsive kind, the kind that once it hunts you, it never leaves you until your heart obtains its desires.

I know better than to accuse Leah of triggering those foreign feelings inside of me even though she occupies most of my thoughts now. But it feels like something inside of me has melted the second I set eyes on her, molding me into a different person, a better person maybe, a fine change from this emotionless dedicated guard I was.

"Is that why you do not want to feed?" comes out a voice in the darkness. Chills run through my body as I hear Chelsea's voice replying my thoughts. Hearing Jane's voice would have been more merciful at this point. Chelsea has always been known for being Aro's greatest exploitation. She was the first game-changer that hooked and sued the Volturi together, denying each of us his own individual freedom for the sake of the whole entity. The most dangerous trait of her gift appears when she is easily able to perceive any kind of betrayal, or imposturous thoughts within this whole. She possesses is the capability to read my thoughts too easily when I have not even voiced them, let alone admitted them to myself. She must have felt the faint wavering concerning my bonds associating me to the Volturi and thus interpreted this observation the only way she could.

"You care for the girl. More than you should. One glimpse at her and suddenly her judgments and opinions matters." She exclaims, rather disgusted "you do not wish her to label as a human bloodsucker. You will hate this loathing look in her eyes once she discerns your blood stained eyes, this horrified expression reflecting in her face when her mind drifts to the person you just killed to feed your own pleasures."

I desperately want her to stop. Her words are like screams of the mermaids in the odysseys. Except I am no Homer. I am no Greek hero that could easily face my fate with my hands tied back on the matt of a sailing boat. Unlike Jane's torturous gift and the temptation behind the mermaids' words, Chelsea's words are not based on an illusion. There is absolutely no thought that I could cling to that promises me everything, the guilt, the growing attachment, the sinful attraction will stop anytime soon. And I hate Chelsea for pointing it out to me. I hate her for not being able to fix my bonds, my priorities. I hate her. No no, I loathe her for using her newly found weakness to crush me with mere abstract sounds translated into vicious words.

A new quake, composed mainly of questions, self doubt and hopelessness begins destroying everything the Volturi has build within me. My mind is a mess of plywood panels, stones and mortar. The qualities and the values that defined me, repressed into a four walls starts exploding, crumbling shamelessly to the ground. The roof trusses constructed by the Volturi are shattered, wooden rafters chaotically scattered here and there. The mortar, personifying Chelsea's gift, keeping the whole building standing is suddenly not good enough to shield this entity from the magnitude of the quake. Chelsea's gift is betraying me when I needed it the most. She kept me together for as long as I can remember. But right now, it feels as if she is playing with the ruins inside of me to defeat me, to make me surrender to this undeniable fate forced upon me.

"What now, Demitri? I know you are not short-sighted person so what is your plan concerning the girl? Are you considering telling…?'

"No!" I protested. I didn't even mean to open my mouth, let alone voice my emotions concerning the girl.

As soon as the words left Chelsea's mouth, the damage is done. Preserved Data could be irrepressible this way. My thoughts were scattered here and there in my damaged head, but as soon as Chelsea opened her mouth, those forbidden thoughts unconsciously aligned, organized themselves into a potential answer. Aro would know simply everything now. The proof is there. All trapped in my memories for eternity.

Telling Leah the whole thing, like Chelsea were about to suggest is out of question. Tangling her in my problems is the last thing she needs. Aro wants _her _because she was the weakest link in the sequence. Using my so-called attraction to her to get her to join seems contemptuous and cynical enough. Plus judging by Leah's character, she is not one to be fooled by vile things such as emotions. A little unwanted cricket is shamelessly whispering in my ear, enlightening me on how I am not good enough and how I will not be able to handle the rejection, a thought that frightens me even more than Aro's cold wrath.

The amalgamation of Leah and Aro in the same thought gives me the chills. It automatically makes me locate her in your mind. She is with her brothers on the river that separates the wolves' territory from the rest of the reservation.

I heave a sigh of desperation.

Chelsea interpreted your unwillingness to speak as her cue to continue.

"What? Do you want me to kill her? Will that solve your problem? If it makes things easier for you to handle, she does not feel the same, and probably never will. You are a worthless leech to her after all".

I stiffen for a second. Then before I could even process what I am doing. I found myself being tackled to the ground, face down in the dirty muddy ground. Chelsea's high heel on my back is keeping me pinned and unable to move. The pressure she is exercising would have been enough to crush a human's vertebrae axis.

What happened? I close my eyes, trying to understand what got me in this position, my advanced mind not seeming able to cope with the fast continuous déjà vu twirling in my mind. It took me a few seconds to process everything: at the mentioning of Leah's possible death, I blacked out with rage, and attacked Chelsea. I actually attacked a highly-ranked guard; someone who, I would under normal circumstances know could easily eliminate me.

She laughs triumphantly, her voice ringing through the night, shaking her head at my foolish show of aggression.

"Demitri, Demitri, Demitri…'

I stay silent and motionless, accepting my defeat hoping I haven't just lost the tiny glimmer of hope I had to just leave Leah out of it. I was wrong about Chelsea. I realized this a little too late. Chelsea might not be my ally after all.

Aro never touches Chelsea's hand. She is already too independent for his liking, too important to even suggest any type of compromise. Alec and Jane always fight for Aro's attention while Chelsea sure acts like a settler. She keeps all the sheep from losing their direction. Although who keeps Chelsea –who technically worked as the Volturi's shepherd– from resigning is a great mystery.

She has all the weapons she needs to bring me down. Slaughtering me herself, at this moment would be excused by masters. The reason is accurate and strong enough. Her high rank would protect her from any reproaches and criticism. Just because she stayed quiet during the confrontation with the Cullens does not mean I should have taken her for granted, not even for a second. She just didn't want to cause a scene in front of the Cullens; killing an ally under the judging public eye would not make a positive feedback for the Volturi after all. I am very threatened by Chelsea right now and I should have done a better job than miscalculate her motives.

"Whatever you are hiding, you are going to tell me" She is not even asking.

"This is none of your business, Chelsea, so you better stay out of it." I manage to say in my normal voice, calmly. I nodded confidently. She arches an eyebrow at my answer before sighing herself. In a blur, she releases me from her grip and leans against a nearby tree.

Your priorities are shaken, I say they need to be forcefully reorganized," I feel that unusual ticklish sensation of something messing with my synapses. She continues "your loyalties to me are heightened. All paths of evasion blocked. What are you going to do now?" even if I know the mechanics and the extensions of Chelsea's gift, it is just impossible to fight it, unless you're a natural like Miss Cullen.

"I don't know Chelsea; it is not something I voluntarily sought"

Chelsea's blank expression stays blank expecting me to continue. I helplessly laugh about it and angrily admit to everything.

"I'm telling you this, Chelsea. I don't care if he considers you as my accomplice or conspirator. I don't know the Hows and the Whys, it just happened."

She sighs dramatically "Ah! The joy of love at first sight" she exclaimed in a mocking voice before an unidentified fiery emotion crosses Chelsea's eyes; it was gone before I could interpret it. "I think it is something bigger than you and bigger than her. Whatever it is, you need to tell her, or at least ask her about it"

I think about it for a while, weighting my options. Leah's safety outweighs everything else.

"No" I shake my head before giving Chelsea a stern nod.

She smirks at me "from all the guards, you are the last one I thought would have the courage to defy Aro's rules. I got to say, you were the easiest to tame right after Jane. Like a little puppy"

I stayed quiet. "I had nowhere else to go, Chelsea"

It wasn't until I saw Chelsea's smirk widen that I noticed my slip, "Had" being the operative word in my statement, a testament to the accuracy of Chelsea's words. I was petrified. My lapse was more relevant than needed to be.

Chelsea quieted down for a while sighing, holding my gaze, some strange understanding spark in her eyes. "You need to talk to her. The bond that connects you is the strongest I have ever seen since the werewolves' era. I heard some stories but their accuracy and application to the shape shifters is questionable. So trust me, hiding the truth from her could be classified as the most selfish decision you could even make."

I eye her suspiciously for a while. She nods, holding my gaze the whole time, the honestly in her eyes emphasizing her words. She knows what she is talking about. Afton and she have joined the Volturi together. And everyone knows Aro is keeping Afton just so Chelsea wouldn't rethink her priorities. I smile; Chelsea is an ally after all. She just has a twisted way of showing it.

I ponder over the whole conversation before asking her "what do you think has triggered the whole thing?" She obviously knows something she is not telling me.

Chelsea looks at me before carefully answering "Aro has mentioned their fascinating way of functioning, but he never went into the details. That should be your starting point. Besides, you need to talk to her, for your sanity's sake."

I stay quiet for a while before my phone rings suddenly.

It is a laughable thought, how a simple sound resonating in the night, echoing in the forest can be the source of such a pure terror. Only one person could be calling me right now and this person is always up to no good.

"Speaking of the devil..." Chelsea exclaimed, smugly but concerned.

The interval between two rings is exactly 5.3 seconds. I have 3 seconds to pull myself together before answering the phone. A phone call that might decide my fate.

I take an unnecessary breath, suddenly very nervous under Chelsea's scrutinizing gaze. She knows what is coming my way. I need to answer immediately not to raise any suspicions. Aro being Aro, he would be easily detecting lies.

"Hello" I answer curtly, picking all the confidence that shattered and scattered on the ground when I realized the identity of the caller.

"Demitri!" comes the surprised yet enthusiastic voice of Aro.

"Master" politely, firmly and straight to the point.

"I heard from dear Jane that you are handling the mission now"

"You heard correctly, master" I affirmed.

"And how is my little gift doing?"

That's where I find myself trapped, my previous confidence crumbling, and the cracks in my composure starting to turn into fissures as the silence dragged on. Puns are always a part of Aro's games. His speeches never lack them since he uses them as weapons to shred his opponents' open. That is when I sense a boost in my loyalty to Aro; Chelsea sensing the wavering in my composure must have used her powers to keep me on track by strengthening my bond to the Volturi. She could not do much concerning the situation regarding Leah but she surely could help with Aro.

I smile gratefully at her before lightly answering Aro "She is fine, at home, carefully weighting her only option"

An uncomfortable silence falls upon us before Aro's cheerful tone came bursting from the receiver "I knew I sent the right person to equilibrate Jane's gift. Do not let me down, Demitri" Aro's classical way of pressuring you.

"Yes, Master"

Aro hangs up. It was not a surprise when I realize dust has replaced the phone in my hand.

I have incised the only way of communication with the Volturi, and I do not regret it, not even for a second.

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><p><strong>Well the story is stuck in my mind for ages now, and I am sort of worried it kind of lost its <em>fresh<em> aspect, so your suggestions are always welcome.**

**~Gia**


	9. Betrayals And Bonds

**I am just going to shamefully hide beneath a rock while I let you read this.**

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><p><strong>Leah's point of view<strong> - _the next morning_

I wake up the next morning disorientated. It takes me some time to dispatch reality and dream as consciousness finally possesses me. And honestly, I cannot remember the last time I slept this well. It is totally unexpected considering I had an appointment with the other side yesterday.

Doomsday is in 4 days.

I lay in bed, waiting for the panic crisis, the paranoia, the terror to drown me. instead nothing. I replay last night in my mind: Jane's anger, the Cullens being summoned, the tracker's deal. Nothing make sense. And for a pessimist, I am being quite optimistic. Hope is an obsessive demon that would not stop chasing me no matter where I go. This is the final battle, I need to panic, I need to drown myself into suspicion and paranoia to know this is real, this is happening, that I am standing in front of a dark tunnel, waiting to be summoned by the dark ones. There is no place to hope in the world of the dead, and I need to plant that seed in my brain.

The Volturi are chasing me. and they probably will, for the rest of my life. There are basically no way out.

* * *

><p>Loud knocking can be heard from the other side of the door, instantly followed by a recognizable enraged voice.<p>

"Open the damn door already, Leah!"

I groan and roll over on my side, in a failed attempt to ignore the shouting. I remain unaffected by the volume of it, a direct result from having endured twenty brothers at once. Besides, as much as I am annoyed by the unnecessary noise and clamor, I wouldn't mind keeping _him_ and his angry banter out. But eventually, his threat of breaking in, gets me to get up, because he is clearly not joking.

I open the door as coldly as I could, letting my anger seep in every syllable I pronounce. "What do you want?"

To say Sam is enraged would be a lie. this is close to madness. I have this expression of his committed to memory since our dating days. No good comes out of it, and now that there is a wolf trapped inside of him, catastrophe is around the corner. but I am not backing out. Last time I have checked, I have not in any way personally harmed him.

"what is wrong with you?" I was taken aback by the offensive bluntness of his question. Rage, I can easily handle. Insult? that would be harder to digest. Even after Emily, he always treated me like a fickle heartbroken glass doll. but this, this is a whole new level of power abuse and rudeness.

"excuse me?"

"Haven't it came to your mind the need to inform me you were having a damn tea party with your little leech buddies?"

I eye him up for a few seconds before carefully answering

"I believe it was none of your business"

Sam's eyes widen, his expression dumbfound, he is slightly shaking. That was confirmation enough, but before I could even start explaining, Sam comes out of his stupor state, and starts yelling in anger.

"the hell is not! I can't believe you were this irresponsible, Leah"

Realization strikes me like a ton of bricks. He has no idea for what purpose the Volturi are really here for. He must have heard they were around but have not even asked why I was meeting them. His accusations are based on picked-up facts and not on the whole interlinked story.

"Leah. They. Could. Have. Hurt. A. Lot. Of. People. " he slowly articulates every syllable as if offensively talking to a mentally retarded individual.

I close my eyes in surrender. He will never change. The worse thing is that his harsh words still sting, even six years after the break-up. As sure as I am of my clean break, I realize the wound haven't totally metamorphosed into a scar yet. And that forged the idea that I will never change, will probably never change my reaction to such vicious words. The anger was traversing my veins like molten rocks during the eruption of a volcano.

"But they didn't! Are you even interested in knowing why? because they came for Me. So how about you leave me the hell alone, go to your little fiancée and help her decide whether her wedding gown should be out of lace or satin while I get toasted by my leech buddies"

As I turn to get inside, laughing darkly at my unintended pun, I glance a hand reaching for my wrist to stop my movement. Before I could register what is going on, I hear the cracking of a bone and an agonized scream.

"Don't you dare even consider touching her."

In a minimal interval of time, a dark shadow had managed to break one of Sam's arms. Sam in his wrath fit turns into a wolf. His size is ridiculously huge compared to the tracker, who bravely stands his ground, before everything starts to go down the gutter. For the first few minutes, the Volturi is playing Sam, which is oddly satisfying to watch, but as Sam's broken bone heals, the fight becomes more intense. it takes Sam a radically long time to realize the tracker cannot be taken by surprise from behind, so a confrontation is the only option.

I should let them fight it off. I cannot care less, so why I have this urge to interfere, God only knows. Sam is bouncing on the tracker, already at an advantage. Even though he lacks Demitri's gracefulness, his huge frame is not something you can overlook during a battle. I just stand there for a couple of minutes while the two perform this complicated dance of fight and flight. This is ridiculous. I need to stop this. if one of them is killed, trouble will sweep us all by its huge eternal tornado. Sam seems to have gained the upper hand when his paws are straddling Demitri to the ground. Even at this moment, the tracker has not lost his smart smug expression. His eyes drift to me, a hint of some unknown emotion in his eyes, he is not even struggling to get out of this mess. A suicidal vampire, does that even exist?

The wolf in me is irking to get over, seeking interference. Sam elevates one of his clawed paw, going for the final strike when everything becomes clearer in my mind. Mere nanoseconds before Sam's claws shredded the tracker into a million particles, I leap into him pushing him away from Demitri. My expression angry and challenging. I growl in warning, strolling territorially before the Volturi, in front of Sam, not breaking eye contact with him.

_**Don't you dare even consider touching him.**_

Even under the werewolf mask, my expression is as smug as Demitri's earlier. Sam not backing out, growls loudly in defiance. He is calling the others. I know he will not hesitate even for a second before getting rid of Demitri. But is he not aware of the deadly consequences it may have? The whole area extended from Forks to La Push will know no peace for the ten centuries to come.

In a flicker of a second, Sam is bouncing, in a ridiculous attempt in catching up with the tracker.

* * *

><p><em>Close to Midnight.<em>

By now, Sue, being one of the senior counselors of the tribe, would have heard of the little tantrum I pulled this morning, so turning back home tonight is out of question. My mother having been through a hard time herself might have started accepting the foolishness shading all of my actions and learned to overlook them but she will not be able or try at least to understand my motives, nor can I, if that matters.

I am lost. All my life I have been looking for something, and everywhere I turned, Sam, Sue, Jacob, everyone tried to tell me what it was. I accepted their answers even though they were often in contradiction and self-contradictory. I was naive, I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer. it took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: That I am nobody but myself. it is not until being placed involuntarily midway between freedom and dependency that these revelations start striking me.

I need to go, explore the world, find myself in places I have never dreamt of visiting. Getting out of this uptight box I seem to be living in. In the middle of a claustrophobic crisis, I start running. It is what I always do. But this time, the familiarity of the woods is scaring the death out of me more than my unknown destination will ever do.

"I know you did it out of spite, but I am grateful nonetheless." A voice in the darkness echoes. My built-up-in-the-heat-of-the-moment dream shatters, as the sound extract itself from the shadows to metamorphose into a dark persona.

Recognizing the intruder, I could not help the scowl.

"Trespassing was off-limit, leech!"

* * *

><p><strong>Demitri's Point Of View:<strong>

"It does not matter, orders concerning your safety were very specific and strict."

Leah laughs humorlessly "Safety? Are you kidding me right now?"

"No, he was touching you." I mentally face-palm myself for my lame excuse when the mere thought of another man hurting her, or even touching her is enough to drive me to madness. Are you not even interested in acknowledging what you do to me, Leah?

"The last thing I need is a brain-washed leech getting into my business telling me they were assigned to protect me from family."

"Maybe the problem is not me, maybe it is time for you to open your eyes and look around you."

I stiffen in fright I might have already said too much. Her stubbornness is frustrating. This is the kind of behavior that makes you want to commit a genocide but at the same time, passionately grab her and tell her everything. She is looking at me surprised that I am capable of making a comeback. I back away a few meters, and wisely deviate my eyes from her.

"I apologize for my temper and my rudeness"

A moment of silence passes before she quietly tries to walk away.

I cannot let her walk away.

"Are you even considering the offer?"

"No".

"You should"

"And why is that? Because then you can all protect me from my family all the time you want?"

"No, because you are in deep trouble if you are not".

Can't she see it? what she does to me. That supernatural effects that only magicians have over their marionettes. The kind of affection that runs deeper than dead organs and frozen blood, the type that makes you want to protect her even if your life is at stake. I am unquestionably and willingly ready to go this far.

But before I can deal with her demons, I need to face mine. I do not know what triggered Leah's next idiotic actions. But I don't think even my fated bond to her will be able to save her.

From myself.

* * *

><p><strong>Leah's point of view<strong>

What does _he_ know? Just because I happened to save his ass so Sam could go to hell, he thinks we are a team?

I look at him for a while. He looks _decent, _as decent as a vampire can get, and he's edible, the kind of individual that is ready to handle whatever you throw at him, starting with the witch's wrath. _Interesting._

For one moment, I do not know what possesses me, but an evil idea came to my mind.

"So you are saying you are less dangerous than my family is? Is that what you were implying?"

I bet he can see that mischievous glint in my eyes, but what can he do? He obviously cannot hurt me, so why not take the opportunity to torture a Volturi for a while? Without breaking eye contact, I get down and pick a random rock. I start playing with it, not bothering to look up to realize he's scrutinizing my actions, calculating my next moves. I smile. I am sure he has no idea where this is going.

"What the hell are you doing, Leah?"

"What grants my safety once I am in Volterra surrounded by hungry leeches only seeking my blood?"

I pick the rock up and cut my wrist deeply with it. It hurts, but it is worth it since the tracker's expression is pretty hilarious. Instantly, we are face to face.

* * *

><p><strong>Demitri's point of view<strong>

Leah is officially insane. What the hell is she doing? Hunger is not an emotion I mastered controlling. I never felt the need to anyway, living in a dark place where food is brought to us. So how the hell will I be able to hold back? I hold my breath the instant the first tints of the scent hit my nostrils. It is an appealing mixture of the rusty smell with the beautiful scent of the muddy earth.

But I have to constantly remind myself that this is an alluring trap, set by Leah of all people. She's a siren, from the same species that hunted Odysseys in his epic. The only difference is that Leah is the destination, rather than part of the journey.

I try to distract myself, think about anything but the beautiful smell in the air. I try to focus on the fact that it is _her, _that in my sane mind, I wouldn't dream of hurting her. I close my eyes, blocking the view of the leaking blood, but also Leah's smug expression from my brain. It helps but it is not enough.

I open my eyes to find her still looking at me. It's her, I can see it now. I smile at her before walking slowly in her direction. Her tough demeanor cracks when she takes a step back, then two, then another, till her back hit a tree. I got her cornered, I smile predatorily at her. For an instant, I can see the regret shielding her eyes; she is reconsidering everything she has done. And I can tell she underestimated me, labeling me incapable under any circumstances of hurting her. Which is perfectly true, but she does not know that.

"Killing me is not in your best interest, leech. you will get killed for it too!"

I ignore her feeble attempt at breaking my focus, because swiftly snatching her wrist. I softly but strongly take her hand in mine. I hold her wrist up, my eyes never leaving hers. we stay quietly like this for a few minutes. It is the first physical contact we ever make, I wonder how Leah interpreted this high-voltaged electrocuted shock traversing her body, paralyzing her for a few seconds, or if she even felt it at all.

Leah can't bring herself to try to snatch her hand. Her rhythmic breathing and pounding heart calming me. Every contraction is pulling me under, shielding me for Danger and Temptation. The wound starts to heal. I watch the phenomenon with utter fascination. I was never able to survive looking at a similar scene.

I do not let go of her until it becomes a faint scar.

"Stop tempting me, Leah"

* * *

><p><strong>Leah's point of view<strong>

_"Stop tempting me, Leah"_ He whispers in the tranquility of the night.

Stop? what does that mean?

"Excuse me?"

He humbly stands immobile, a statuesque figure, a three-dimensional representation of one of Michael-Angelo's masterpieces. The only sign of life he gives away are the glint of a foreign emotion in his eyes. His dark intense stare is piercing through my core, as if desperately struggling to project something within me. I, myself, am too busy trying to decipher a shape, an emotion in those pitch black hues of his. They obviously hold back a dusty old story that only few can access and some scattered blood-stained thoughts, concrete proofs of the aftermath of the inner war he has just gone through. I have seen this expression before but my sense of deja-vu is awkwardly wronging me, sending me over the edge.

I have no idea when I start shaking, feeling the wolf starting to bounce within me, clearly recognizing something I am failing in perceiving. My head is twirling with unanswerable questions and unasked for possibilities.

Everything clicks. My nervous system starts transmitting the newest updates to my synapses and my muscles as soon as the supernatural wave has been registered. The secondary wave hit more brutally as my blood pressure starts dropping and my knees weakening. My blood circulation experiences some unknown errors effectively cased by supernatural phenomenon . My breathing becomes shallower as I fall unbalanced to the ground. It takes me a while to realize I am hyperventilating, an experience very closely compared to an inner earthquake.

The worse thing is that I cannot lose him from my sight, even as he becomes blurry and unidentified, he's there.

"No, no, no that's impossible"

I blink. He's gone.

* * *

><p><strong>I am not sure why, but i'm feeling my writing is regressing. Please feel free to post your thoughts :)<strong>

**A while ago, I posted a story "In the heat of the Night". It is Santiago-centric, which may explain the lack of reviews. So it would mean a lot to me if you gave it a shot.**

**Thank you.**


	10. Warm Hands, Cold Heart

**Still writing from underneath that rock. I even called it Shame.**

**Happy New Year and ENJOY :)**

**I wanna thank you all for the support, It is wayyyy more than I have ever expected. **

**Dedicated to my 50th reviewer: Ishii Sen Ling**

* * *

><p><strong><em>Leah's point of view<em>**

Demitri.

I still find it hard to breath as I lay on the cool grass, a few hours later, calming down from my inner crisis. The coldness of the muddy ground is a soft touch compared to my suddenly unbearable high fever. A frightening sense of alienation starts drowning me , my body and soul becomes two strangers. The wolf in me does not make anything easier. Being a werewolf imposes such a complex controversial issue when it comes to self-defining, I realize. wolves stays in packs while a human is perfectly capable to think on his own. What am I? Am I considered as a part of a whole or an individual?

I am not sure what I am. Does a straying wolf exist? did a shape shifter ever felt so alienated that he felt the need to distance himself from his family, his surroundings, his land? It is a paradoxal thought, since the werewolf genes were triggered by the dangers threatening our mother land when the Cullens decided to camp nearby.

A chemical alteration is preparing to shift my perception of the world surrounding me, with the intimate encounter with one of the deadliest creature on earth being an additive admixture fastening the process. My mind is twirling with a million though, my conception on the laws defining the interactions between people forever changed. It is like before and after Einstein. This vindictive pitiless soul that ordered the redefinition of the whole concept concerning the laws of physics. Question is: How do I redeem myself? How, when I just realized every thought that ever traveled my mind is doubted. What must be my starting point when everything has just crumbled to the ground within a simple moment?

_You are fooling no one, Leah. _My cruel conscious screams at me. Right. I am fooling no one.

Demitri.

Even Demitri is a doubtful thought. But at the moment, he is the _**less**_ doubtful thought of them all. This uncertainty travels in all directions. I am not sure what he is experiencing, as I am clueless what is it I am experiencing toward him. Is it true? Where is he? Is he not supposed to explain what the hell is going on with him? Shouldn't he be denying it like I am desperately trying to do? I am not even aware of this feeling of dependency starting to spread in my bones, my cells, my synapses until now.

_'' Stop tempting me, Lea.''_

A frightening shudder run through my body understanding the double implication in his words. A moan escapes my lips realizing that these mere words coming out of this secretive soul are enough to make me blush like a preteen girl. A laughable contrast to his emphasis on this image of a sinner in me. A sinner, who apparently is unconsciously leading him to the apple tree.

"What is wrong with you?" Sam's voice breaks into my illusion, echoing loudly, a dramatic decrescendo aiming to stir my guilt and misery . My resolutions crumbles, mere obstacle in the Cyclops's way. In a miserable little corner, I find myself agreeing with Sam. What is wrong with me? Is this even possible to share a bond with not only another supernatural specie but with the deadliest kind of them all? A foolishly dangerous question: It does not seem like it. It does not feel like it. But it is close enough.

Ignorance is a bliss, they say. And damn it, they were right. I am standing midway between two armies. The eternal battle between knowledge and emotions, subjectivity and objectivity. I am struggling in my mind to separate the two as they collide with each others. The knowledge of his emotions should not seep into my mind, mingling with my raw feelings and help redefining every doubtful idea that crossed my mind. I have never been fair in my judgments. My judgments based on the amount of anger felt toward certain things, thus objectivity is not a strength of mine.

Demitri

Every thought seems to stray back to him. He is that powerful magnet that is smugly challenging me by . This knowledge I hold hostage of could be powerful enough to shape the destiny of many parties. I should have been grateful, I found a way to entrap this glimmer of hope that seem to flaunt around for a week now. But for some reason, it brings me no joy, or satisfaction. I don't need him or his secret. I can take care of myself.

I get up to go home. I miss home. it has been a while, and living in my little world of misery and worrisome, I feel distant from home. Alienated. I don't even see or hear from anyone anymore.

Are my feelings of isolation considered the second step to complete the bond that fatefully link me to Demitri? I would rather not. I groan in frustration. I am not even sure about the presence of a bond. It is not just the glimmer in his eyes. it is something else that I am not greatly familiar with, I realize.

I seem desperate to bury those thoughts in the back of my mind. Demitri was getting under my skin, which is as dangerous as playing with fire now. But I willingly let the chilly breeze, travel between the microscopic void between the cotton fibers of my blouse and stab into my heat, freezing my ribcage in the process.

Winter is all in the blood this season.

* * *

><p><em>I am in a maze. Trapped within gloomy dark concrete walls. I cannot seem able to phase, to destroy these endless parallels of ramparts. Rounding one corner, I find myself in a crowded public playground with children running everywhere, enjoying their blissful youth. I stare at them, not wanting to intrude in this perfect world, this sense of imprisonment forgotten for a few minutes until a misplaced dark shadow <em>_ interferes. _

_In a blink of an eye, red is everywhere. For a second, I think myself delusional, or the sunlight in my eye is the reason I'm seeing burgundy everywhere. But then bodies and organs were starting to fall around me. Screams of agony escaping the lips of innocent children and suicidal parents. Mantras of suppliant prayers and pleadings decreases in intensity composing a dark decrescendo in a sinister Death-centered tragedy. As atrocious as the scene is, I cannot bring myself to look away. _

_The shadow takes the form of a man. I bite back a cry of fear as I recognize his identity._

I wake up in a halt, my heart drumming in my chest. I hug the cover closer to my chest as tears start running down my cheeks, my neck.

_**There's no escape.**_

I open my eyes slowly. I almost scream as my field of vision is entrapped by two golden hues. A hand comes pressing on my mouth, my voice stuck in my throat. "Not even a whisper, Leah"

There's no escape, indeed.

* * *

><p><strong>I really hope i am not boring you or wasting your time.<strong>

**thoughts and suggestions are always welcome.**

**Have a nice day :)**

**Gia**


	11. His Fiery heart, her icy skin

**Has been the toughest year I have ever gone through, filled with desperation, hard pressure and mourning.**

* * *

><p>His fiery eyes, her icy skin<p>

"I open my eyes slowly. I almost scream as my field of vision is entrapped by two golden hues. A hand comes pressing on my mouth, my voice stuck in my throat. "Not even a whisper, Leah"

There's no escape, indeed.

One moment, I am witnessing a massive massacre from an omniscient point of view, the next I am in the scene, as a victim. My mind is racing, trying to brutally separate reality from illusion. But it couldn't. Everything tells me they are somehow interlinked. All the main elements are featured: the gloomy atmosphere, the darkness and the monster with golden eyes that ordered the death of these children.

For an instant, I could not breathe, mourning the lives of these children, blaming myself for their death. They're dead right? No, No they cannot be. A wave of panic washes over me until I realize I'm in my room; They must represent a tiny pigment of my subconscious' capabilities. However, this omniscient abstract creature that finally reveals itself as my real demonic enemy has not vanished along with the rest of the delusion woke up to.

I do not know, how for the life of me, my subconscious succeeded in slowly taking control of my mind and actions. It constitutes a huge part of me and the idea of its destruction is laughable. I was not like this. I am NOT like this. I could not let myself be. I am turning into a trainwreck these past few days and it is starting to become too much. I keep reminding myself to be strong, yet I could not bring myself to stop shaking. The images were too traumatizing to be simply forgotten.

I'm shaking even though I was in the right mind to be aware of my surroundings. My room, the safest place existent for someone like me. yet I can feel his powerful vibe apparently only his eyes, the only perceivable traits distinguishable in the darkness, can project. His presence terrifies me, cut deep into my being and starts tearing my limbs cell by cell, in a horrendous attempt to stab my heart. It is not a metaphor since the pain is not as figurative as the image.

"Stop shaking Leah" A feeble, almost tender voice echoes in the night. A voice I could recognize anywhere, anytime. The simple words were wrapping me, I could not tell if they're meant to suffocate or to stabilize me. Anyhow, in a flicker of a second, they manage to put me in a trance I could not escape even if I want to. And I really want to. Because my reaction confirmed most of the questions reeling in my head and his. My body remains frozen but my mind is begging it to actually move. Instincts over Intelligence. My worst nightmare just began: Demitri got the wolf in me wrapped around his finger.

But I could not go down without a fight. I must give the old Leah a chance to float from underneath that sea of doubts she was left suffocating in. I defiantly, look him in the eyes while monotonously stating "Your eyes do nothing to move me"

"I know, my lady. It was not for you. I actually tried. To feed. I can even tell you their names." At my annoyed expression, he develops. "I couldn't keep their blood down", he admits more quietly, his eyes darkening at the memory.

An inexplicable pang of disappointment shot through my system. Something about the image of Demitri coldly toying with his victim triggers an icy wrath to sizzle underneath my skin. I try a new approach.

"What are you doing here, Demitri?"

"You owe me an explanation."

I look at him suspiciously. His scrutinizing eyes are singing a lullaby only my blood can detect. I cannot lose at my own game. "In the middle of the night?"

He is quiet for a moment, obviously elsewhere until he coldly answers "Well, you did not seem able to really develop your thoughts out of excitement last time we have met."

He is obviously playing me. The worse thing yet is that I am well aware he is winning. His dry answers, his cold dead heart and his icy demeanor against my fiery temperature, my pumping heart and my controlling subconscious.

"I do not owe you anything, Demitri. Because whatever you assume is going on must be a tiny fickle of your hallucinating mind."

I know the fire I just ignited is capable of burning us both, yet I could not resist. I cannot cave in to telling him. I was pushing him to his limit, wanting to use his invisible wrath to my favor, to make him drop out the subject. It was not only a matter of just winning a game, but more importantly to protect him in the best way I can. His ignorance is his greatest asset. And mine. And I am not giving it up.

Instantly, my back was against the closet. The handle pressing into my muscles, uncomfortably but not hurtfully. A surprised gasp unintentionally escapes my lips; I was almost sure Demitri is physically powerless when it comes to handling me. All the physical contacts he initiated were careful, almost delicate. But this, this is different. Demitri has fire in his usually blank eyes. His grip on my shoulders is hard but not enough to bruise. He stares intently at me before smirking and moving his hands down my forearms, leaving a trail of icy passion behind. My eyes are dilating on their own, my body caving in to this foreign pleasant sensation it never experienced before. I now know why people tend seek this kind of passion their whole lives. It is the first time that I understand the power of a touch, not only to skin but the kind that stabs right to the core.

I stay motionless unable to look away from his eyes. His hands slips from around my wrists after a few seconds, making contact with the closet door behind me; he actually hit the furniture, creating a deep dent in the wood, the sound of the impact piercing. I did not flinch at the act for a second, convincing myself it is because I am too used to my bothers' casual anger.

"Why don't you go wake my mother up, while you are at it?"

He stares at me for a few second, as if I am crazy before casting his eyes down in shame at his conflicted behavior. After having calmed down and given me my personal space to breathe normally again, he meets my eye, admitting defeat.

"Please Leah, I need to know what this is. Whatever it is, I promise I will protect you"

* * *

><p><em>~ Flashback ~<em>

(A **black hole** is a region of spacetime from which gravity prevents anything from escaping. It **absorbs all the light** that hits the horizon, **reflecting nothing**. Event horizon: A mathematically defined surface situated around a black hole that marks **the point of no return.)**

Sue will never be the same again. As soon as the grief and the sorrow started to faded away from everyone's heart that you start feeling lonely and left out. that was the case of my mother in the aftermath of my father's death. Hidden underneath her black dress with only her head appearing and the shoulders hunched defeated, Sue looked as if she was being swallowed down into a black hole of a stellar mass. She needs to be comforted. I hesitate since the last person that is even capable of really comforting her is me. As I was discreetly leaving to my room, a barely audible "Leah?" comes from my mother.

"Yes mom?"

She meets my eye, her gaze blank but piercing at the same time. She looks at the table, silently asking me to join her. I calmly move the chair to sit but the noise is still too loud.

We sit in complete silence for a while, my mother's eyes never leaving the view out of the window for a long time before she turns to look at me. Sue Clearwater is known to be one of the toughest women on the reservation. Anyone would be damned if they thought they could measure up to her. Yet she looks fragile and _old_ at this moment.

"Did you love him?"

"Leah love, we live in a very dark world, where everything is not what it seems. He was… my_ anchor._

"Do you think I will ever have what dad and you had?"

"Will you ever imprint, you mean dear." I cast my eyes down in shame, not being able to articulate this loathsome word. "Darling, there is no shame in asking. We all know how confused you are."

My mother's eyes never leaving my form before she starts explaining to my utter surprise: "I have heard stories, thousand year old legends about our long lost ancestors. The Children of the Moon. Women werewolves were quite common as that time. Although those creatures were more wolf than human, their mating techniques are the same as our tribune's shape-shifters. Men just know their mate just by looking right through their souls. They feel their center of gravity shifting from its normal axis. It is an extremely powerful sensation than any other they ever experience. Their animalistic instincts urges them to act upon them and reveal to their mate what they truly are."

She stays quiet, thoughtful for a while before I ask her. "What about women?"

"A woman's heart is fragile, more bent to experience emotions and she usually knows it, that's why she doesn't let anyone in easily. Naturally, a female wolf is more reserved, her trust extremely hard to gain. This is why technically a woman cannot imprint."

My heart sinks and my eyes stings. I have not realized how badly I wanted it until I knew for sure I would never have it. "Technically?"

Sue nods. "Yes, when it comes to imprinting, it is always men who initiates the bonding process. Women are foolish in matters of the heart. That is why they are always given the choice to reciprocate their love for their mates."

I am astonished. No that cannot be possible. "So what you are saying is that women are always imprinted on, whether they were human… or _werewolves_?

Sue looks me straight in the eye before she nods again whispering "Men know, Women love"

_~ End Of Flashback ~_

* * *

><p><em><strong>Men know, Women love<strong>_

He is still standing far from me but the intensity of his gaze on me is enough to knock my breath away. He understands the implications of this statement. He is thinking it over, every thought a rotary mechanism responsible for the movement of another series of machinery. He seems focused, the silence is making me extremely nervous, but even more scared of breaking the ice.

"You are definitely worth it" He whispers eventually, a soft sound quickly fading into the air, never meant for me to hear.

"Worth what?" I ask in a steady normal tone.

I watch him smiles faintly, not expecting an answer from him. Apparently, he does not know me well yet.

Now that we are starting to communicating, time to settle what ground we stand on. First things first. "Why were you so insistent yesterday that I give the deal some thought?"

His demeanor cracks for a split of a second before he sighs and starts explaining. "You were not a random choice, Leah. You know how Aro is always thirsty for power and control, every step is calculated. He needs someone he can trust - I couldn't help but raise an eyebrow at this – He had a good feeling about you. He was sure he could transform you into a cold blooded guard since you are … genetically incapable of producing.

I don't understand. What does motherhood and my fertility has anything to do with it? My cluelessness must have been apparent on my face.

"All the signs proved you were incapable of sealing a bond with _someone_ unlike all of your brothers. That might weakened you physically, but it would have been Aro's greatest asset since you will not be dedicated to anyone else, a rarely amongst werewolves. But now that we know for sure that you are not as original as he thought, he might have spared you peacefully. I knew it was risky but it was the only quarter of a plan realizable. "He falls silent for a few second before he fearlessly meet my eye and stating matter-of-factly "Note well Leah that I have no intention of hurting you or let any harm cross your way, especially not the Volturi. So you will stay here, while I meet them with your decision in a few days."

"And what would my decision be, Demitri?" I ask him icily.

He had the courage to meet my eye before calmly stating that I am not joining the Volturi as long as he lives.

I break eye contact, feeling self-conscious under his scrutinizing stare.

Demitri cannot face the Volturi alone. They will eat him alive. His expression shifts to resolve when my heartbeat betrays my cool composure. He instinctively reach out to touch me. I don't pull away. His electrifying touch renders me uncomfortably calm.

"I trust you Demitri" I give a confirmative nod before continuing "and you should understand very clearly that these sentiments are mutual. I have no intentions to get you … harmed, especially not by Aro." He searches my face fruitlessly for any hint of what I might say "However, I cannot find a plan that protects the both of us in equal measures.

Which is why I am joining the Volturi"

Since the mere thought of his death is able to eternally paralyze me.

But he does not need to know that.

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><p><strong>Love.<strong>


	12. Chapter 12: Confrontation

**I'm deeply sorry for the long wait. Working to get my Bachelor Degree soon. But i promise i will not drop it or start any other story before finishing this one first. **

**To Zed, the noor of my eyes.**

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><p>Demitri is not here.<p>

Here I stand, facing the smug face of Jane Volturi and Demitri is not here.

He was supposed to be here, being the honorable Volturi that he is, comforting me with his gentle threats, uprooting my conviction about joining the Volturi, about making the mistake I am ready to commit a million times over for his ungrateful person.

But he is not. In my despair, I spent the previous 48 hours running through every scenario possible, trying to calibrate my heartbeat so it won't betray me when facing them, when facing him in front of this unpleasing audience.

Yet I am hyperventilating, bile and pure acid rising to my throat ready to leave my body at any second. Questions starts filling my head, expecting the worse. Is he alright? Do they know? What if they suspected him when seeing his golden eyes, casting him off this mission? Jane smirks knowingly, and it only succeeded in making me sicker.

"Good to know you still know your place, dog" Jane starts sweetly.

I do not answer, only focusing on letting air into and out of my lungs rhythmically, my eyes not leaving the ground. My heart is beating erratically, trying to repress the images that started flooding my mind. This moment of icy passion meant something to him too. Right?

Where the hell is he?

Jane gets impatient since she has that frown on her face. I feel a familiar tug on my heart. Someone is trying to get through the invisible shield enveloping me. My eyes leave the ground to meet the Woman's in the back.

_Chelsea._

She is the one who manipulates bonds. So she must know. Since the beginning. Even before I did, I just realize. She is as expressionless as the rest of them, yet she radiates serenity and grace. _Answer._

"I will join the Volturi" I answer as confidently as I could.

It was obvious Jane has not expected such a response, for once she is speechless.

At that moment, Demitri decides to make his appearance, out of nowhere landing in front of Jane, facing me. He is sneaky even when surrounded of vampires, emphasizing his natural abilities as a tracker. A mixed expression of relief and horror is apparent on my face, my eyes stuck on his dangerously golden eyes. He smiles privately at me as his eyes shifts to stare at his colleagues from the corner of his eye. My heart starts throbbing no matter how prepared I thought I am. I close my eyes for a moment to compose myself. He is here.

Without waiting for the other Volturis' reaction, he starts addressing me.

"Well then, welcome aboard, Miss Clearwater." He extends his hand to me to take. My heart gives a leap. I can spot Jane smirking at my reaction, mistaking my fear for Demitri for fear of Demitri.

He is smiling widely now. This is going to be good. I try to keep the beam from my face, forcing my expression to remain serious and stoic. We will be together from now on. My happiness is one step away. I can see Jane frowning in the background but I only have eyes for Demitri. No one else matters. Only Demitri is capable of drawing me to him like a magnet.

I never realized how wonderful the bond is supposed to feel till this moment since beforehand, it seemed like a curse being drawn to the enemy. And no matter how awful it sounds, I would always choose him first.

He extends his hand, ready to seal the deal. As my hand automatically touches his fingertips without even waiting for my consent, I feel the world blur around me. I look up ready to shift when I feel pure coldness wrapping around me. I am unaware of what is happening till the wind striking my face like a blade. My mind take a while to register that I am being carried away. Demitri's grip on my waist and back hard enough to crush.

The expression on Demitri's face makes my heart leap. Not from joy but terror. His golden eyes are no longer gentle, his welcoming smile faded into something way darker. I have never seen Demitri look or sound this deadly before.

"One protest, one wrong movement, and you're gone, Leah"

His words hit me like a ton of bricks. He was not bluffing. I was ready to give up everything to him. His hand travels to my neck, his nails digging threateningly into my spinal cord. Instead of the sparks, electricity travels to my bones electrocuting me, paralyzing the muscles in its wake. I am frozen, and for the first time in my life, I shiver from the cold.

Flashback

Demitri's POV

She is insane.

She drives me insane.

Insane enough to be where I am.

Two of them know I am here, yet they are fine pretending.

I sigh, I guess they want to see me crawling on my knees. I take the first step toward the house and hear a soft amused "Oh this is going to be good". At that moment, the alpha heads out of the house. His satisfied expression turns vicious when he smells me. Instantly metamorphosing into one giant russet wolf, he attacks me. I sigh, not moving an inch but I can almost see the smug expression on one Edward Cullen looking out the window as I mentally prepare myself to be torn to pieces.

I guess I deserved that.

When I regain my eyesight, I find myself on a sofa surrounded by all types of Cullens staring at me, and one uncharacteristically fidgety alpha who looks uncomfortable and would rather be elsewhere.

Everyone is dead quiet and unmoving, tense expecting the worse of me yet I sit more comfortably on the sofa before starting lightly: "Well, you keep a lovely home, Mrs Cullen".

Edward shoots me a warning look "Demitri…" before his eyes shift to the alpha "Explain."

I look around before my stare fixes on the beautiful girl clinging to the alpha. Her heart starts beating faster when looking at me. She looks into my eyes for a long time as if seeking my soul. Eventually, she gets up from Jacob's side, gently smoothing the wrinkles of her flowery skirt, and heading my way before the alpha grabs her, pulling her gently but protectively back to his side, yet she shakes him off.

"It's ok, Jacob. He is harmless."

That image gets me infuriatingly jealous. Why can't I have that with her? Why can't she see that the Volturi would change her, molding her into a perfect assassin, erasing everything she is now, everything I came to love about her? Am I willing to take this risk, just to keep her by my side, regardless of the person she might become?

The loathing and the madness is clear in my eyes, as I can see Edward shifting tensely, ready to intervene if it came down to it. When she is directly in front of me, she places both hands on my face, cupping my cheeks as she looks once again deeply into my eyes. "Such a sad soul" she whispers. The warmth radiating from her skin, her beating heart, the intense look in her eyes reflected perfectly the genuine innocence deeply rooted within this outcast by nature.

And then the images started fast-forwarding through my mind.

Images of Leah, and only Leah.

The look of wonder and surprise is obvious on Edward's face, so how did she know?

End of Flashback

I look down at her, she is staring ahead, not bothering to move or shift or even stare at me. She won't even blink, her face scarily blank for someone who cannot mask their emotions on normal days.

She does drive me insane. Which is why I did what I had to do.

With the Cullens' help, I was able to fend off most of the Volturi, scattering our scents in all different orientations to fend them off. Chelsea did not bother participate in this fruitless dance, knowing I am shielded. Felix is not quite motivated in pursuing me either, knowing it would end up with me dead. Santiago is miles or so to the east. And even Jane is far off, the wrath seriously damaging her intelligence.

Which leaves Alec. Who is mile and a half behind me. No matter what direction I take, or strategies I form, he seems to read through all my plans. He is extremely skilled in predicting people, figuring out the different scenarios, calculating the Variables and selecting the most probable. He is not one to vent and his silence is one of his strongest assets.

This is bad. No matter how to look at it. I am almost on Canadian borders and it would not do me any good to go into hundred hectares of empty forests. Leah's heartbeat is a dead giveaway even with the waters crashing on the cliffs and the ruffles of trees surrounding us.

Flashback

"Nessie, what the hell is going on?"

She removes her hand from my face, mirroring her father's look before ordering "Explain"

I look at Jacob before stating simply: "I am Leah's mate"

I never expected the following silence to be this uncomfortable or the elephant being this sneaky, crawling in a room full of vampires. "Imprinting, I believe you call it?"

Jacob is still silent, looking around him, realizing he is the only one left in the dark. "I do not buy it"

I shrug. "I do not care. But know that Leah agreed to become a Volturi for me."

The look of pure betrayal should have been a payback but it does not feel like it since Jacob is tremblimg, on the brink of changing.

End of Flashback

It has been almost half an hour that we are going in circles, Alec on our track, never relenting. And to add fuel to the fire, Leah is still dead silent, refusing to talk or even acknowledge me. I am in deep trouble if I get caught. To think Aro might off her just to punish me.

A certain noise in the background comes forward, and I focus on the smell. Can I do it? Can I put her life at risk just to save ourselves? She did not ask for this, yet I couldn't come up with a better plan. I circle around a certain area, before tearing off my cloak and Leah's jacket making sure our scent is the strongest there before heading back in Alec's direction. She does not even protest.

"I am so sorry Leah" I tell her regrettably "Please forgive me" I beg as I urge her to take a deep breath.

A moment later, our bodies hit the waters.

The only surface that could distort her heartbeat and completely clear our scents is the waters, which left me no choice but to jump into the pacific. I swim a bit more deeply, my arms still gently wrapped around Leah, hoping the icy water could harmlessly decrease Leah's fast heart rate and the elevating pressure prevent Alec from locating us. He is still on the surface, paralleling our pace. However, he comes to a halt nearby the area where our scents is the strongest. This halt gives me a much needed head start as I keep swimming, aware of Leah's lost breath. A few seconds later, she starts struggling against my grip. I clutch her tighter. A few more seconds is all I need. Few seconds in which Alec will be deciding what to do. He wonders around before choosing to head east. I swim fast to the surface, bringing a limp Leah along with me.

I keep track of the Volturis' movement. None seems suspiciously close. The Cullens are performing their daily tasks, and even the wolves are doing whatever they usually do. All in all, nothing looks overly suspicious.

Once on the coast, I lay her on the sand, carefully hidden from view between the rocks. She is heavily shivering and barely conscious. Too terrified of touching her, I stay back. Panicking, I thought of removing her wet clothes to prevent her from getting too hypothermic but before I can act, she was coughing water, but the shivers has not decreased. She gets up straightening her back before her eyes lock with mine.

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><p><strong>Happy Read :)<strong>

**2 more chapters.**


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